Page 49 of Voracious

I sit, my hands fidgeting under the desk – Tylar is on my right, and Luciella leans against the windowsill, arms folded, still lost. Aria and Barry sit beside Kyle, opposite me.

Everyone stays quiet while I try to explain everything. I start with Kade – how we started sneaking around, falling into a cycle of seeing each other when we could. I keep glancing at Lu – she’s not looking at me. But she’s listening.

“I realised when we were in Greece that what we had was dangerous. I wanted to spend the rest of my life with him, but there were so many roadblocks.”

“You went to Greece too?” Kyle asks. “How ‘together’ were you?”

“He was my boyfriend for nearly a year.” I shrug. “We went to a lot of places. Going away meant we didn’t need to hide.”

“Then what happened?” Tylar asks. “Did you love him?”

I take a deep breath and tell them some more, and all the while Luciella stays silent, staring at her shoes. She nods at some parts, shakes her head at others and then finally, she lifts her head. “Why would you lie to me? What harm would it have done if you’d just told me you had a thing with my brother?”

Tylar snaps her head in Lu’s direction. “It was more than just a thing. And she was scared her brother would find out!”

Lu shakes her head again. “So you used me as an excuse to stay quiet.”

“No,” I reply. “You told us to stay away from Kade and his friends. You even made Tylar break up with Dez!”

“Because I was worried about our friendship! Which obviously needs re-evaluated if you need to keep such a thing from me! You even lied that you only had one brother – not two! Who does that?”

My eyes water as I stare at her. “My brother has been abusing me since I was fourteen years old. He would sneak into my room and touch himself, make me touch myself and he recorded it. He’d barge into my shower when I was a minor and watch me. Hesoldme to his friends, hit me and controlled everything I did.”

I pull down the front of my top, enough to reveal the scar he left with the key. “I have scars all over me. All in hidden places. He’s sick. He killed someone in front of me because I refused to kiss him, and then made me touch him, repeatedly, every single fucking night when I went to bed so he’d stay away from Kade – he would sleep naked beside me and force me to make him—” I stop, lowering my head as my voice breaks. “He is a monster.”

Kyle lowers his head in shame. “Fuck.”

“I’m so sorry, Stacey,” Tylar says. “I wish you’d told us, so we could’ve helped you.”

“I went to the police, and he managed to fuck that up too. They thought I was mentally deranged and in need of psychiatric help. Even Nora took his side.”

“If my mum knew the truth, she would have kicked him out.”

“I told my dad,” I say, glancing at Kyle, who’s looking at me like he’s seen a ghost. “I told him the things Chris used to do to me, but he called me an attention-seeker. I begged him to help me.Begged. And he said I was a hormonal teenager who needed mental help.”

“Stacey…” Kyle trails off, shaking his head as his lips tremble. “I’m sorry. I should’ve protected you.”

“It wasn’t your fault. Chris acted like the loving big brother around you all, but he was the devil behind closed doors. I told the one person who should’ve protected me and he… he didn’t believe me.” I wipe under my eyes. “He looked at me differently after that, treated me like I was a brat… I was slowly losing my dad. How could I tell someone else? I’d risk losing them too.”

“I can’t believe your dad didn’t listen,” Tylar sneers. “If he was alive, I’d smack him.”

Aria is hugging herself, her eyes wet. “No one should ever go through that. Your father should’ve protected you. I’m sorry he failed you, sweetheart, but we won’t. You have us now. You have all of us around you. If you want him arrested, tell me, and I’ll arrange it.”

“I don’t want him arrested; I want him dead.” My words are solid, I don’t even hesitate. “I want him dead.” I look around me, at everyone on my side. “He doesn’t deserve to live after everything he did to me. And I highly doubt I’m the only one.”

She nods. “I understand.” I know she does. She probably understands the most out of everyone here.

“His girlfriend left him because he said he was in love with someone else.” Kyle runs his hands through his hair. “She slapped him in front of me and told him he was sick.”

Tylar gulps. “I should have noticed the bruises. Me and Luciella had no idea.”

Luciella has been silent the entire time, but then says, “I asked you, and you said you fell. Another lie.”

“She had no choice, Lu!” Tylar snaps at her. “Have you listened to a word she’s said? She was forced into silence!”

“Please don’t argue. I lied to you both. I’m to blame.”

Kyle places his hand over mine. “Don’t,” he says, a tear sliding down his cheek. “Don’t you dare say that. You are not to blame for that asshole’s actions. I lived in the same fucking house as him, and I… I… Fuck, Stacey. I’m such a shitty big brother.”

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