Page 36 of Off the Beaten Path

I let out a sigh. “We’re not together. I just told Charlotte we were to get her off my back.”

“And that worked?” Finley asks, sounding a little surprised.

“Yeah,” I say. “I guess. She hasn’t tried asking me out again.”

Disappointment sits heavy in the lines of Mom’s face. “I was so excited for you two.”

I feel a stab of guilt in my stomach, but I remind myself that I don’t have to do what they want of me just because it makes them happy. For the last four years, I’ve had to tell myself this. June is my responsibility, and although I’m very grateful for their help, I have to do what I think is best for her. And same for myself.

“I wasn’t meaning for the rumor to spread around town,” I tell Mom. “I didn’t expect Charlotte to tell anyone.”

Mom rolls her eyes. “Of course she told everyone.”

“Wren said the same thing,” I mutter under my breath, but of course, Mom hears, and her expression perks up.

“So you are talking with Wren?”

I shrug. “Well, yeah, I’m renovating her cabin.”

“But you’re getting along?” Mom asks, equally skeptical and excited. I know where she’s going with this, and I don’t like it. I’m feeling jumbled up enough about Wren without her butting into it. If she finds out about the app, it’s all over.

“Barely,” I say, although this doesn’t feel like the whole truth. Or even most of it, if I remember the moments on my porch with my hands on her skin, beneath her hair, or when I opened up to her about Mia today, something I haven’t done with, well, anyone, really. That doesn’t feel likebarelygetting along, but I can’t tell them that.

June returns to the kitchen, saving me from Mom’s next comment. Her hands are clean, and she even managed to get most of the chocolate off her face, although there’s still a little smudge on her cheek. My lips lift into a grin at the sight of it.

“Ready to go, June Bug?”

She gives me a gap-toothed smile. “Can we take some brownies home?”

My bed feels especially empty tonight, the sheets cold to the touch, and for the first time in a very long time, I almost wish there was someone here with me. A warm body I could reach for. Delicate curls I could wrap around my finger. I can picture it when I close my eyes, red curls like the fire licking up my spine, spreading through me until I’m warm all over, my skin flushed and hot underneath my blankets.

My phone buzzes on the nightstand, startling me from the dangerous track of my thoughts, and I reach for it quickly, needing to cool down.

The name on the screen doesn’t do anything to help.

LikeStrawberryWine: You up?

I swallow thickly, kicking the blankets to the foot of my bed to cool my skin, and sit up so my bare back is resting against the headboard before I respond.

user6872:Finley says no good ever comes after a text like that.

LikeStrawberryWine:I knew I liked her.

LikeStrawberryWine:But don’t worry, I’m not trying to seduce you.

I don’t know why, but those words don’t hold the same comfort they used to, especially not now when I’m aching and wanting and feeling a little unhinged.

user6872:Who said I don’t want to be seduced?

I seriously have no idea where that response came from, but I typed it and sent it before I could second-guess myself. My heart races in my chest, my blood pulsing in my ears, and I have to force myself not to respond with a “jk,” mostly because I’ve never said “jk” in my life.

My phone vibrates with an incoming text before I can spiral.

LikeStrawberryWine:You did. Many, many times.

Before I can type back a response, another text comes in.

LikeStrawberryWine:But you’re always allowed to change your mind.

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