Page 82 of Second First Kiss

Kat looked over her shoulder and sent him a narrowed glare.

“Fine, as long as you’re in the same room I’m always sporting wood, but it’s a state I’m getting used to.” His hand was on her thigh, making lazy circles on her bare skin.

“Every time?” she asked surprised, because surely not every time.

“No matter how many times I rub one out that morning or the night before or both, I see you and I can’t control it. I’m like some horny teen all over again. It’s damn embarrassing, if you must know,” he said.

He buried his nose into her hair and breathed in. “Now, you in these silky things you call pajamas? That image will accompany me in my morning shower. So you might want to shower before me, because I’m going to use up all the hot water trying to get you out of my system.”

His words were genuine and honest and erotic in a way that made her pajama bottoms go wet, because beneath the silk was nothing but skin. A conscious choice, one she’d made when thinking about him.

“What if I need to get you out of my system too?”

His fingers came to a standstill.

“What does that mean?” he asked.

“That you’re not the only one who can’t stop thinking about how good it was and wanting to do it again,” she admitted. Thank God she was facing away from him, or she wouldn’t have been able to admit anything at all. “I know this is crazy, and probably a mistake for the both of us, but how can a mistake feel so good?”

“You are not a mistake,” he said vehemently. “You got that? Nothing about this is a mistake. Is the timing off? Maybe. But if we keep passing up opportunities, I don’t know how many more the universe will give us before it’s game over. Do you want to give this a chance, Kitten?”

“I don’t know,” she said honestly.

She could tell that was not the answer he wanted to hear, but instead of anger he met her with patience.

“Do you want this to be a short fling that ends in a few weeks?”

No,” she said, surprising them both. “But until I get custody of Tessa, I don’t want anyone knowing. I get that there’s already speculation, but I don’t want to confirm it until the judge makes his ruling and Tessa is mine. And once she’s mine, she’ll be my number one for a long time. I know what it feels like to come in last, and I don’t want that for her.”

“Are you saying you’re accepting applications for number two?”

She rolled onto her back and lolled her head to the side so she could see him. “That’s the problem. You deserve to be someone’s number one. I can’t give you that. And I don’t know when I will be able to give you that. If ever.”

“I’m a patient man.”

“I’m a mess.”

“Your mess doesn’t scare me. In fact, it attracts me. I have to be perfect for everyone. My job…on and off hours. My family, my friends, the lodge. But with you, you accept me as I am.”

He moved his hand from her thigh to her stomach, where he slid his thumb under the fabric, right above the elastic of her pajama bottoms, and ran it back and forth along her bare skin. Goosies rose in a blast, like whiteout conditions in a midwinter storm.

“What would people say? An ISB agent with a stellar reputation spending time with Tina Rhodes’s daughter. Hell, with Kat Rhodes?” She was no longer tied to just her mom’s reputation. She’d built one of her own and it seemed no matter how hard she’d tried to overcome it, make up for it, it still followed her around like a lost puppy.

“I don’t care.” The way he said it, so quick and as if it was a topic he’d already put some thought into, told her one thing.

“You’ve already had to defend me to someone?”

He rested his head up on his elbow to look down on her. “Does it matter?”

Her stomach roiling, bringing her back to that visit with her ex’s parents, she nodded.

“Then yes,” he said.

Kat tossed back the blanket to leave. “I won’t come between you and your family.”

“Whoa.” He wrapped his big biceps around her stomach like a bike lock and pulled her back to him. “You think my family doesn’t want us together?” He kissed her nose. “Kitten, it’s the exact opposite. They’re all for it.”

“Really?” It came out in a whisper.

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