Chapter Twenty Eight
Danielle
I had to go home at some point. I dreaded going back, especially after my dad had told me explicitly that there was no place for me, but I had to collect my things. I was going to arrange a meeting with my mom separately so I could talk to her without my dad getting involved and saying things that would make everything worse.
I had grown up with my mom working hard and my dad being home. I had never had the relationship with her that I’d had with him. Still, I wanted to talk to her away from all of this.
It hurt so much that my dad was the one that had told me I wasn’t welcome at home anymore.
I parked in front of the garage of my childhood home and took a deep breath. I had to do this.
My dad was home, not on the golf course. I had hoped to avoid him. He glanced up at me when I walked into the house, but he didn’t say anything. The atmosphere was so tense I couldn’t breathe, and I felt like crying. I swallowed the tears down. I wouldn’t show him how much it hurt.
I walked into my room and packed my bags, taking all my clothes out of my closet and putting pictures away. This was worse than going to college. This was permanent, and I hated it. I hated seeing how empty my closet was, I hated taking my pictures off the wall, and I hated pulling the covers from my bed. It wasn’t supposed to end this way. I wasn’t supposed to be chased away like some kind of criminal.
A few times, my dad walked past my room. Every time, I wished he would say something, anything to break this awkward silence, even if it meant we fought. But he never did, and I started to think maybe he was checking on my progress. Maybe he wanted to be sure I left nothing behind. Maybe he wanted to know when I would be out of his life for good. The thoughts only made it worse, and I struggled to keep control of myself.
I took the bags out to my car one by one, stacking them in the trunk and in the backseat until I had everything packed up. I went back to my bedroom one last time to check if I had everything, to make sure nothing stayed behind. To say goodbye to the life I had lived between those walls. Everything was changing now, and I wouldn’t be able to come back to this room or back to the person I once was.
My dad appeared in the doorway, and I closed my eyes for a moment, sighing.
“I’ll be out of your hair in a moment,” I said. “I just need a minute.”
My dad didn’t respond until I was ready to leave. When I turned around, he stood in the hall with his arms folded, leaning against the wall opposite my door.
“Are you moving in with him?” my dad asked.
Why did he care, I wondered?
“I am,” I said. It wasn’t like I had anywhere else to go. Lisa’s place was too small for the two of us, and she had never planned on having a roommate. With Rodney being the baby daddy, it only seemed right.
“I guess I can’t say it’s inappropriate,” my dad said. “You’ve already done everything with him a father could be scared of.”
God, I couldn’t do this. I shook my head and walked past my dad, leaving my room for the last time. My dad followed me, talking as he did.
“He’s twice your age, Danielle. What the hell do you think you’re doing? It’s sick. You’re throwing your whole life away.”
I spun around. I’d had enough. “I don’t need this from you,” I said. “You forfeited your right to say anything in my life when you kicked me out. I’m on my own now. I’m in love with Rodney. I know you know he’s a good guy. You wouldn’t have been friends with him for so long if you thought he wasn’t worth your time.”
“Being a friend and being a lover are two different things. And he’s my age. We were at college together. Think about what you’re doing.”
“I have,” I said. “I can’t help who I love, but I can make my own decisions, and if I want to be with Rodney, I’ll be with Rodney. You don’t have to accept it, but you can’t be a part of my life without accepting who I love.”
My dad shook his head. It was hard for him to wrap his head around, which I understood. None of this had been planned, and I was having a hard time figuring out which way to go now, too. But my dad didn’t have to be a complete dick about it.
“So, this is it? You’re walking out of my house, and I’m never seeing you again?” My dad sounded exasperated.
I couldn’t believe him. “You’re the one that threw me out. So, yes, I’m walking out of your house. Whether you see me again is your choice. But unless you’re going to accept me and my love for Rodney, our relationship and your grandchild, you’ll have to stay away.”
My dad paled a little as if the pregnancy was news to him.
“Is it true?” he asked in a soft voice. I thought we had been through this. I thought the media had done enough.
“Yes,” I said. “It’s true. And Rodney and I are keeping the baby, raising him or her together. It’s the right thing to do. I’ll be six weeks on Saturday.”
My dad looked like he was going to faint. Maybe he’d hoped that it was a lie, that it had been speculation.
“You’ll never get away from him now,” my dad said.