Page 85 of Show biz

“Humiliating me was for the best?” she screams, pushing Atlas out of her way.

“Shitballs,” Atlas curses. “Lay, can I have your knife for a second?”

“Don’t call me that,” she growls. “You can’t have my anything, dingbat. It’s been five Goddamn years, Mav!”

Every step toward me makes Layla angrier. I think my face is going to explode with how hard she’s staring at me.

“I overthink everything, I can’t make new friends, because who wants to forge a friendship with the girl who can’t make a decision. I’m constantly worried about inconveniencing people, even my sister!” Layla screams. “Want to know why?”

“Why?” I breathe. My blood is roaring in my ears as I wait for her to drop the next verbal blow.

“You taught me my words are worthless. My wants are meaningless, and my desires don't matter. I’m just finding my rhythm in talking about what I enjoy in any capacity. Half the time, I forget to eat because I don’t want to bug anyone by telling them,” she tells me.

Tyler stares at her with glassy eyes, sighing. “God, Baby Girl,” he whispers.

“My strength is a joke, my coldness an effort to hide away from the world, and I kept thinking, Seán would realize I’m just a bimbo Barbie playing dress up. I’m not Lenny,” she rasps.

“No one needs you to be her,” I rumble, trying again. “You just have to be yourself.”

“Who is that? I don’t fucking know,” Layla says, the tears starting to track their way down her cheeks. Angrily sniffling as she dashes away her tears, she shakes her head. “I’m a ghost of a person. I don’t ever know what the right thing to do is, and that dance in there was one of the scariest things I’ve ever done. Seán O’Brien let us walk out because he wants something from me and I made it known people would miss me if I disappeared. Professionally as well as my family. Lennon would fucking burn the world down.”

“We’d join her,” Draven mutters. “You moved so damned fast tonight. One second you were smirking at a mob boss and then next… you were killing a man who deigned to touch you.”

“Fucking, grabby Jack,” she grunts, spitting on the ground. My eyes are wide as I watch her. “I hear he bled out.”

“You’re not even sorry,” I snort.

“If he was willing to grab me on command for God knows what, then no I’m not sorry,” Layla scoffs.

There’s a dark spot on the inside of her arm, and I lurch forward, grabbing it to look. There are darkening fingerprints wrapped around the crook of her bicep.

“What dickless son of a bitch grabbed you like this? Was it Jack?” I ask her. I don’t think he touched her for long enough to hurt her.

“One of Seán’s goons,” she says airly. “Seán protected me. It’s just a really ugly reminder of this fucked up night. I don’t need your apologies, Mav. I need my Goddamn life back.”

Pulling away from me, she looks over at Tyler. “I think we’re safe enough for you to call a ride-share now. I’m more than ready to get the hell out of here, please,” Layla says.

I feel as if I just had my heart stopped as she steps away from me. Layla trips in her hurry, but Draven scoops her up into his arms.

“I think that’s enough, lovely. Your legs are shaky, aren’t they?” he croons.

Her fingers are twitchy as she nods, tucking her head into his neck. “I think I need some sugar,” she says softly.

I remember Lenny always had gummy bears hiding in all kinds of places, and I wonder if it was because of adrenaline crashes. Lennon O’Reilly’s life is always busy, full of surprises, and a performance is the biggest high that I’ve ever experienced. It trumps drugs any day.

“A soda it is, beautiful,” Draven promises right before she faints dead away.

“Shit,” Atlas mutters.

“I think we need to talk about your timing, man,” Tyler says, meeting my gaze. “It sucks.”

The ride-share pulls up as I nod, feeling as if I’m holding my dick in the wind. I didn’t need to bring it up today, but I needed to start to apologize.

Now to show her I mean it.

Atlas stares at me as we get into the car, accusation in his eyes. I’m done playing the ogre in Layla’s story. I love Atlas, but I want to be a part of the best bits of this beautiful girl’s story too.

It’s a very confusing place to be.

---