***
The sun woke me up, streaming into Pater’s room. Stretching wide, I let the events of the last twenty four hours wash over me. At this point yesterday, I had woken up on the hard ground, smelling of garbage, and wondering if the moldy sub I had stashed away would make me sick. Today, I was clean, well rested, and lying in the bed of the one man I knew I would love until my last dying breath.
I rolled over to discover the bed was empty, and cold. I hoped it was only because Pater had gotten up early, and not that he had chosen not to sleep next to someone incubating something as vile as the child inside of me. I knew that I disgusted him, and until this thing was born, he would probably continue to look at me with disdain. It had to go, and soon. Sitting up, I ran my fingers through my hair, and crossed my naked legs underneath me. I didn’t know when Pater would be up to come get me or check on me, but I was ready to empty myself of the filth inside and start anew.
As if he knew I was awake, the door to Paters room flew open and there in front of me was my God on legs. I couldn’t distinguish the look on his face, but I knew nothing on Earth would rid me of the good mood I was in.
“Good morning Pater,” I said sheepishly, giving him my most demure smile.
“Breakfast is downstairs, and if you hurry, there might even be a little treat for you.”
Pater threw the nightgown at the foot and walked back out the door as I scrambled off the bed to retrieve it. A treat? What exactly did he have for me? I didn’t know but I was excited to find out.
When I was dressed and stopped in the bathroom to pee, I found myself at the top of the stairs. Did I dare try and do it now? I wanted to. I was ready to start making Pater happy and to follow his every command. Deep inside of me, I knew this might have a good chance of working, but I also didn’t want to upset Pater for being late after he’d already told me to hurry.
Storing the idea in the back of my brain to bring it up to him later, I carefully descended the stairs and met him in the kitchen. The smell of bacon wafted to my nose and my stomach growled with the expectation of food. It really had been quite a while since my first decent meal, and he hadn’t fed me last night. He was most likely too excited to get me into his bed and it didn’t dawn on him that I might not have eaten. It wasn’t something he should have to worry about anyways. My hunger shouldn’t be his concern.
Pater pointed at the chair next to him. “Sit.”
“Thank you, Pater,” I smiled lightly, pulling out the chair and taking a seat. A plate full of bacon and eggs sat in front of him but only a small shot glass of clear liquid was on the placemat in front of me. What was inside?
“I’ve got you a very special drink there, Lucy Marie. As soon as you finish the contents, you can make yourself a plate of bacon and eggs. How does that sound?”
“Thank you, Pater,” I smiled. He was so incredibly thoughtful and I could almost literally feel my heart overflowing with love for him. I grabbed the drink and brought it up to my face.
My nose burned instantly as soon as I whiffed the contents of the shot glass. I knew what it was without even having to drink a single drop. Bob had been a stickler for a clean kitchen after my mother died, and I spent many mornings scrubbing the floor with bleach.
“This is bleach,” I noted. I wasn’t questioning him or the contents, merely stating a fact. An amount this small shouldn’t hurt me too much. It certainly wasn’t going to be pleasant, but the fact that Luke had been so gracious to get it for me, offering me assistance in my task when he didn’t need to, gave me the courage to drink it.
Luke didn’t respond verbally or physically to my statement. He just watched as I put the glass to my lips, scrunched my eyes and downed the entire thing like a shot of vodka. He smiled, just as the effects hit me full force.
Dropping the glass, I fell off my chair in a coughing fit. My nose burned, my mouth was on fire and my esophagus was eating itself from the inside out. I gasped for breath, and my eyes watered as I looked up to see a pleased look on Pater’s face. In the back of my head all I could think about was how happy he looked.
“If you make a mess on my floor, Lucy Marie. You had better clean it up.”
Luke stood over me, strip of bacon in hand and walked out leaving me to writhe on the floor. For several moments I gulped in oxygen, trying to calm the inferno inside of my lungs. Slowly, I crawled over to the sink, pulled myself up and turned on the faucet. I needed water more than I needed anything else in the world.
Even after drinking my fill, I knew that my mouth, tongue, and throat were scorched, and it was highly unlikely I would even be able to talk coherently through the blisters I could already feel forming. I sat down against the kitchen cabinets and let my tears fall as I realized this was not going to be an easy task. If this hadn’t killed the demon inside of me yet, I was going to have to kick it up a notch, but for now, I needed a moment to compose myself.
“Wake up, Lucy Marie,” an angry Luke kicked me with his boot, grabbing me by the hair and pulling me to my feet. “Is this any way to show me your love? You’re sleeping in my kitchen.”
“I’m sorry, Pater,” I rasped out in barely a whisper, my throat protesting with every syllable.
“What was that?” Pater asked. “I couldn’t hear you.”
Gulping through the horrendous pain in my throat, I repeated myself, “I’m sorry, Pater.”
“That’s better. At least now I know I don’t have to listen to you scream as you continue carrying out my orders. Is that right?”
I nodded at him, saving my breath and my strength. He was right though. The shot of bleach had made it horribly impossible to use a regular speaking voice, and he didn’t need to hear my whining and crying.
Pater dragged me into the living room and let me go on the floor. I looked up at him, determination developing deep inside of me. I could do this. One little shot of bleach wouldn’t be my undoing.
“Go ahead, Lucy. Let’s see how devoted you really are to me. I want to see you rid yourself of that monstrosity growing inside of you.” Pater sat down on the couch, crossing one leg over the other, and watched in mild fascination.
I nodded once more and scurried to my feet. I was determined to have this done by tonight, and then maybe tomorrow, he would love me the way I loved him.
I scrambled up the stairs, and without a second thought or time for regret, I hurled myself down the wooden stairs, hitting as any steps as gravity would allow on the way down. When I landed at the bottom, I turned my head to see Pater smiling, and I smiled back. He was proud, and it filled me with hope and more determination.