Page 114 of Pity Party

She changes the subject. “Tell me about you.”

“What’s to tell? I’ve been busy raising our daughter. In my free time, I’ve built a successful business.”

“Did you get married?”

“No.”

“Is there someone special in your life?”

An image of Melissa pops into my mind. “Not in a romantic sense.” Even though there’s no denying that’s how I feel about Melissa. It’s what I want with her. I just have to find the right time to tell her, and hope like hell it isn’t too late.

“Why not?” Beth asks. “You always wanted to get married and have a big family. Did I ruin that, too?”

“You sure didn’t help,” I tell her. Then I explain, “After you left, I dreamed you’d come back to us. I don’t know how long that went on—two years, three, five? But once I realized you weren’t going to, I was afraid to ever let anyone get that close again.”

She breaks eye contact with me and looks down at the blanket on her bed. “What about this Melissa who came to Chicago with you?”

“She’s Sammy’s boss,” I tell her. “She’s a good friend to both of us.”

“Can I meet her?”

The question catches me off guard. “Why would you want to do that?”

“To thank her for everything she’s doing for Sammy.”

“I don’t think so,” I say after a long moment. Getting to the heart of the matter, I ask, “What is it you’re after, Beth? Are you hoping to get partial custody of Sammy? Because you must know I’d never allow that.”

“I would never do that to you, Jamie. I know I don’t deserve anything like that. I guess I just want to know my daughter. Maybe have her come to Chicago and stay with me for a few days from time to time.”

“If that ever happens,” I tell her. “It will be a long time coming.”

“I understand. But maybe as the two of you get to know me better, you’ll feel easier about my being back in your lives.”

“Maybe.” I don’t want to give her false hope. While I’m sorry she’s lying here in a hospital bed with a slew of injuries, I’m still not inclined to make things easy for her. And not out of vengeance either. More out of fear.

The rest of the day is spent with Sammy and me taking turns with Karl and Fritz visiting Beth. The day is overwhelming for all of us.

Somewhere around two, I decide it’s time to go home. I tell Beth, “Sammy has a big day tomorrow and I want her to get home so she can prepare.”

I call Sammy in to say goodbye. When she comes back into the room, it’s clear she’s worried about something. She walks over to Beth’s bed and asks, “The doctor said you’d be okay, right?”

Beth smiles. “He sure did.”

“And you’re going to be living in Chicago?”

Beth nods her head. “I wonder if it might be okay if I see you again soon.”

Sammy turns to me as though to ask permission. “That’s up to you,” I tell her.

My brave daughter decides, “I’d like that. But next time, I’d like you to come to Elk Lake and see where I live.”

“It might be a while before I’m up to traveling.” Beth sounds sad that Sammy doesn’t want to come back to Chicago.

“That’s okay,” Sammy tells her. “Dad and I will be there if you decide you want to come up.” She’s making it clear that moving back to the States isn’t enough of an effort on Beth’s part, and honestly, I applaud her for that. This is one apology that’s going to require a good deal more work.

“I’m so glad you came,” Beth tells Sammy and me. “I’ll come visit as soon as I’m able.”

Sammy concedes, “You can call me once in a while, if you want.”

---