Page 52 of Marek

But I can’t stop it.

“Because you refuse to learn your place.”

“Bullshit,” I scream. “You do it because you can’t handle the way you feel about me.”

“I feel nothing,” he roars, shaking the cage with his outburst.

“Liar,” I throw back. “At least I’m honest. You are a lot of things, Marek, but I never picked you for a fucking liar.”

“Shut your fucking mouth,” he warns, his voice icy.

“No,” I croak, and then the tears flow harder. “God damn you. Please don’t leave me here.”

He stares in at me, and, for a split second, I can see something flash across his face. I would almost guess it’s hurt, like he doesn’t enjoy seeing me cry, but he quickly covers it with that same old, hard expression.

“Marek,” I wail when he pushes to his feet. “Please. I hate it here. Please.”

He stares down at me, his fists clenched by his sides.

Something about my tears breaks him, just a little.

“I’m afraid in here,” I sob. “Please don’t leave me here.”

I think he might just release me, just for a moment, but he doesn’t. He turns and walks out, without once looking back. My cries fill the empty tent as I curl onto the cool grass and wail. I don’t care how loud or pathetic it is. I hope it fills this entire camp. I hope they all know what he’s done. I hope he lies in his bed tonight and hears my sobs over and over until it torments him.

“I hate you,” I scream until my voice breaks.

Curling into a ball, I use my arm to rest my head, and I cry until there is nothing left but breathy sobs. Eventually, those stop too, and I hiccup as my body comes down from the intense emotional break I just experienced. Finally, everything settles until I’m lying in sheer darkness, not a sound to be heard.

My heart is broken, mostly because I know I’ve left myself feel something for a man I should have never allowed in.

He acts like he doesn’t care, but something about all of this tells me he does.

Marek is a monster – he would have killed me long ago if he wanted.

So why didn’t he?

Why do I matter?

Yet, at the same time, he can so easily lock me in a cage and forget about me.

Is it always going to be the same?

Will he always just use my body and then fight against himself to hate me again?

I’m certain he will, because I’m certain Marek has never cared about another person in his entire life.

He has no reason to, his mother never taught him love and his father left him.

The man has no idea what it feels like to care.

That leaves me with only two options.

I can either keep going and let him in my bed all while risking my heart.

Or I can put a stop to it, not allowing him to come near me at all.

I know which choice is the best.

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