Page 88 of Voyeur Café

“People are complicated, Lucas, your mother included. I kept thinking I’d figure it out on my own. I really thought I could, but I knew if I didn’t, you’d handle it. And by the time I figured out I needed you to step in, you were already making plans to leave. If I talked you into staying here, it wouldn’t be such a big deal for you to give up the money,” she says, matter-of-factly. “Maybe if I could make you think you never wanted to leave,” she trails off. “I don’t know. I’ve always counted on you. With you gone, I didn’t know what to do. I’m caught between being a good mom and losing my house. What am I supposed to do?” The question is rhetorical, and also an admission that she doesn’t have a plan other thanwait for Luke to fix it.

I run my fingers through my hair, one hand after the other. “I’ll figure it out, Mom. You’re not losing the damn house.”

“I knew you’d come through for me,” she says, warm affection in her tone. “But even if you decided not to, I wouldn’t hold it against you.”

I narrow my eyes at her in response.

She tilts her head. “I hate that you left me, but I don’t begrudge you spending Dad’s money on things you want. Even if those things are in the middle of nowhere, far enough away from your mom that she can’t pop over for dinner anymore.”

“That’s not why I picked Palm Springs.”

She laughs, shaking her head. “Of course not. You picked it because you were meant to. Your soulmate is there.” Mom’s right. She is a complicated person. She resents that I left her. She expects me to come back and fix her problems. But she alsobelieves I was meant to leave… Meant to find Allie. To her, none of these things are contradictory.

I arch a brow at her. “I don’t believe in soulmates.”

“Doesn’t mean you don’t have one.”

“I didn’t know she was there when I moved there.”

“Doesn’t matter. She’s the reason you were drawn there. Things happen for a reason. Your Grandad probably didn’t realize when he stopped for gas in Palm Springs seventy years ago that it would lead to his grandson’s destiny, but it still happened.”

Chapter 32

Allie

“Don’t let your ego block your happiness. In some situations, they are mutually exclusive.”-Allie’s Horoscope June 18th

“Joshua Tree?” Hector asks incredulously. “You can’t be serious. Brian!” he yells over his shoulder from his spot at the counter to his husband who’s sitting by the front window.

“I heard,” Brian says at a normal volume, not looking up from his paper. “Not worried about it.”

“Not worried? Are we supposed to carpool with Daisy now?”

Daisy looks up, smiles, and goes back to her drawing.

“Why am I the only person who’s concerned about this?” Hector throws his hands up. “What did Devon say?”

“Devon doesn’tloveit,” I admit. “Although, she thinks it may force me to have healthier boundaries with work. But you know better than anyone how hard it was to find a place in Palm Springs.”

“I didn’t realize we’d given up,” Hector says, arching a judgmental black brow at me.

“We didn’t give up.” I set a consolation iced coffee on the counter for him. “This is a really good option for me.”

“I hate it.Loatheit. Detest it.” He takes a long sip of his coffee. “I am vehemently opposed to the idea ofTurbine Cafémoving to Joshua Tree.”

I lean forward on the counter. “The building isn’t going anywhere. We can meet here for happy hour atErnie’sinstead.”

“The fuck isErnie’s?” Hector asks, lip snarling in offense.

“Ernie was Luke’s Grandad’s name,” I explain. “It’s what he’s calling the bar.”

“What’s the point of sleeping with your landlord if he’s going to kick you out, anyway?” Hector asks, still incredulous.

I point through the window at my landlord-boyfriend. He’s lifting something metal, maybe a motorcycle engine. The details of his broad muscular shoulders show through his grease-smudged t-shirt and tendrils of black hair fall across his forehead. “I promise, it’s worth it, even without the building.”

“Okay, fine,” Hector admits, begrudgingly. “I can see the appeal.”

Truth is, I’m still heartbroken about leaving Station 19. But knowing that leaving helps Luke, makes it okay. I only have a month and a half left here, and I’m spending every second reveling in it while I still can.

---