“You’ve lived in that hospital for weeks. You’ve barely seen the sun. But it is a common pigmentation pattern for women… during pregnancy.” Alison held out her hand when Kate started to speak. “I’m not saying youarepregnant, I’m saying,” she rustled about in her expensive leather handbag, “it’s better to know sooner rather than later. And I didn’t want you to be blind-sided after it’s too late to do anything about it.”
She held out a pregnancy test box, but Kate just stared at it.
“I’m taking the pill.Religiously. And Warren’s been in the hospital for weeks.”
Alison’s lips tightened. “Have you been having your period?”
“Well no, but the doctor said it was common for women not to get their period when taking it.”
“And it is,” Alison’s brows furrowed. “But if I were you, I’d want to be sure.”
Kate took the box, hearing the tests shuffling about inside. She brushed her thumb over the little smiley face on the packaging. “I’ll take it,” she decided. The thought of a child bubbled up inside her, but she ignored it. There was no point even considering being pregnant until she’d actually taken the test.
“And if it’s positive,” Alison came closer, until her familiar perfume cradled Kate in a motherly embrace. “I’ll help you with whatever you want to do. Don’t think that just because I was a midwife you can’t talk to me if you’d like to abort. All right?”
“All right.” She’d had a pregnancy scare after Daniel, and it had been her first instinct back then. “You wouldn’t judge me for it?”
The corner of Alison’s mouth twitched. “I wouldn’t judge you, because it’s a choice I made myself.”
Kate couldn’t quite blink away her surprise. “You did?”
Alison nodded. “After the boys’ father disappeared, I found out I was pregnant. Though I worked full-time, I still received benefits. I could barely keep the children I had clothed and fed. Adding another one to the mix would have sunk me. And it was the right decision to make. So no, there’s no judgement here, Kate.”
“Thank you,” Kate replied sincerely.
“I’d recommend you take the first this evening and the second with your first wee in the morning, when your hypothetical HCG levels would be at their highest. Have you used one of these before?”
“I have. I, um, I had a wee before I left the hospital though,” Kate explained sheepishly. “I’ll need to wait.”
Alison moved to leave. “Will you let me know if you want help with… withthings?”
“I will.” A thread of excitement stirred within her, but she quashed it.Not yet.“I’ll speak to you in the morning.”
Opening the door, Alison smiled gently. “I look forward to it.”
“Fuck’s sake,” Kate muttered, having accidentally pissed on her own hand. Clipping the lid back on the test, she wiped it as best she could with toilet paper before placing it beside the sink and scrubbing her hands clean.
Her reflection stared back at her in Warren’s enormous bathroom mirror. She squinted, inspecting her cheekbones. Itdidlook like she’d caught the sun slightly, but it was summer. Surely a bit of a tan didn’t mean she was pregnant? And she was on the pill. The doctor had been very clear about taking it at the same time every day.
22:00.
She took it at ten o’clock every day. She even had the alarm on her phone to prove it.
To kill time, Kate stepped into the shower, letting the warmth of the water wash her worries away. By the end of it, she had herself firmly convinced. She wasn’t pregnant. She couldn’t be.
The little digital indicator said otherwise.
Kate’s stomach dropped like a stone as she darted forwards to pick up the test, letting out a cry of shock. She poked the little indicator, as though that would make any difference, but the message remained.
Pregnant 3+
Unbidden, her hand came to her navel, and she sniffed. Warren’s baby was in there. With the next sniff, there was a smile. There was no stopping the waterworks then.
Kate made a beeline for the bed. Was this where their child had been conceived?Or, her brain interrupted,was it in the room downstairs during the party?She crept into bed, freeing her hair from the messy bun she’d placed it in before her shower.
When would she tell Warren? Was he well enough to handle the news? Would he be happy?
Kate hoped he’d be happy. Curling up into a ball and putting a soothing hand below her bellybutton, she pondered his reaction.