Page 898 of Not Over You

“I’ll let you two get to dinner, but I hope you reconsider what we were discussing before. I love you,” he says and Owen steps in to hug him then he turns to me. “It was very nice to meet you, Mollie, I can tell you mean a lot to Owen and I look forward to getting to know you.”

I nod as he walks out. Owen closes the door behind him. “So, that was my dad,” he says with an awkward laugh.

“I’m sorry I interrupted but it seems like you at least had some resolution there at the end,” I say very decidedly not bringing up the thing his dad threatened to tell me. I’m pretty sure it was what I overheard. “If you don’t want to go out, we can order in.”

He shakes his head. “Nope, my lady requires tacos, so we are getting tacos.”

The walk to the restaurant is quiet. It’s a chilly night and I am happy to have my sweater. Owen holds my hand and it feels natural yet I feel like something has shifted between us.

He stops me before we walk up the steps to Buckalew’s. “You heard what he said, didn’t you?”

“I did, I’m sorry but you guys were pretty loud and I was right outside the door.”

His arms go around me and we embrace and it feels so right. “I’m sorry you had to hear that, I wanted to tell you but hadn’t found the right time yet. God, I missed you so much and you were only gone a day. Don’t leave again, okay?”

“You don’t want kids?” I ask, dropping the bomb because I can’t help it.

I shiver as he slowly shakes his head. “Come on let’s go inside, you’re cold and we can talk while we eat.”

His hand on my back should feel reassuring but all I feel is cold. I can’t believe this is happening. This morning I was so happy and my life seemed so full of possibilities. Now, I’m not sure. Can I be with a man who doesn’t want a family? Owen and I talked about how many kids we’d have that summer, joking that we’d want at least nine. Obviously, that was a joke, but in my heart of hearts, I’m hoping that Owen is it for me and that included us getting married and having a child.

It’s definitely too soon to tell him that but it’s what I want. After the hostess seats us and we order drinks, I can’t help myself.

“It’s a simple question with a simple answer. Do you want kids?” I repeat my question trying to keep my voice steady.

“The simple answer is no, but the reason is complicated,” he says and all hope I felt today returning to the island is gone.

CHAPTER 32

DEAL BREAKER

OWEN NOW

Things are falling apart and I don’t know how to make them right. The moment I confirmed to Mollie that I didn’t want kids, her face fell and my heart broke, because I know that is something she wants. After the other day when she told me about the losses she’s had, I know what having a child means to her.

My fucking dad, it’s not his fault I didn’t tell her sooner, but I wish I could have told her in time, when I was ready to have that discussion. We’ve only just found each other again and until two days ago, I didn’t think it would be a deal-breaker. I know it is and even though I’ll do all I can to persuade her to be with me anyway, it probably won’t matter.

“It’s not a simple answer for me,” I repeat. “I’ve spent a lot of time around sleazy criminals who weren’t treated like sleazy criminals. My dad makes questionable decisions and even though I think he means well, he’s still manipulative and not a great parent. When my mom died, something broke in him and he became obsessed with his job and molding me to take over.”

I can tell with every word I’m tearing apart what we have. There are tears flowing down her face and I really wish we had stayed home. I get up and slide into the booth next to her, pulling her into my side. She resists a little but then leans her head on my shoulder.

“Yes or no,” she says and I hate the answer I’m about to give her. When we were kids, we talked about our dreams and hers was to have a family. I did not forget that.

“No,” I say and she pulls away from me. “Molls, I don’t want to lie to you. We obviously can talk about it, but I doubt you’ll change my mind.”

Tears continue to stream down her face and my heart is breaking for her, for me too. She sits, her face blank as the server leaves our drinks and I smile at her as she leaves, sensing it’s not the time to ask for our order.

“You want to get out of here?” I ask, ready to drop some money and carry her out of here.

She nods and I signal to the server. I leave some cash and help Mollie out of the booth, holding her hand as we leave and hurry home. When we get to my house, I lead her inside and to the couch, never letting go of her hand.

“Can I ask you something?” I say and she nods. “After all you’ve been through, you’d still want to get pregnant?”

Apparently, this is the wrong thing to ask as she drops my hand and turns to me with an angry expression.

“You have no idea what I’ve been through,” she says. “I’d go through it a million times if it led to a child I get to love and see grow up. I’m already a mother but I haven’t been able to hold my own child yet. Even if the doctor tells me I can’t physically have children, I’d still want to find a way to be a mother.”

She gets up abruptly and I know she’s close to leaving and I don’t want her to go. “Don’t leave like this, I know I’ve upset you and I want to understand as much as I want you to understand me.”

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