Page 744 of Not Over You

An audible sigh comes from her end. Damn, she must be so disappointed in me and that’s what hurts most of all. “I might be your agent but I’m also your friend, Lilianna. If you ever need me for anything, don’t hesitate to call.”

This time all I can muster is a tiny “Mm,” before quickly ending the call. Natalie never uses my given name unless she’s feeling sentimental. I know she means well and all but that’s the last thing I need right now. Otherwise, the dam will break, and I’ll be drowning in my own tears.

After talking to Natalie, I pull up my big-girl panties and go back and sit down. My hands tremble as they hover over the keyboard. Suddenly, they have a mind of their own as they flit across the keys. Until the blank page is no longer void of letters but filled to capacity. With the name of the only man who stole my heart and left me emotionally broken. Physically incapacitated. Rendering me a shell of the woman I was when we’d first met. If this is what falling in love is all about, then I’m done. Never again. In my opinion, it’s not better to have loved and lost than to have never loved at all. Period. End of story.

I’m so angry that I promptly close my laptop to hide the name that’s beckoning me. The only one who would dare torment my godforsaken existence. A name that used to roll off my tongue with such passion and conviction, my heart would burst wide open. Now when I hear it, I want to hide. Cower in the corner like an abandoned child.

Fear suddenly clutches at my chest when the four walls appear to close in on me. I need to get the hell out of here. Perhaps a long walk in the cold, crisp air will clear my head and help me focus on something other than him. I know it’s over, but my heart hasn’t quite caught up yet. He’s never coming back and the sooner I realize that, the better off I’ll be.

I grab my keys and wallet and throw on my raincoat. I have no idea how long I’ll be gone, but since it’s raining, the coat will keep me as dry as possible. I shut the door behind me as I gather the courage to put one foot in front of the other and force myself to walk down the flight of stairs. Avoiding the elevator at all costs, just in case I run into someone I don’t want to have a conversation with. I’m known as the loner around here and that’s fine by me.

Introverts like me don’t need someone to hold their hand.

I take in a deep breath as I push through the lobby doors. I don’t bother putting on my hood since I love walking in the rain. Just me and Mother Nature doing our thing. Besides, I don’t have to hold back my tears when it’s raining.

Several couples pass by without a second glance. I guess they’re too wrapped up in each other to even notice little ‘ole me. It makes my heart ache but it’s a great incentive to pick up the pace. At this rate, I’ll get my ten thousand steps in today.

After a brisk walk, I’m soaked to the bone. Since my raincoat couldn’t keep up with the bouts of torrential rain, I decide to head on home. I’m almost there when a car flies by, splashing me with a tidal wave of water. I want to scream, “Slow the fuck down!” when it suddenly pulls over on the side of the road. A large, bald man in a t-shirt and jeans gets out of the car with an umbrella in his hand. Seriously? It’s a little too late for that, don’t ya think? With a flick of his wrist it opens and he’s now holding it over my head.

“My sincere apologies, Miss. I was going too fast for this weather. Please, allow me to drive you home.” He’s kidding, right? I have a problem with his close proximity, let alone with luring him to my front door.

“That’s very kind of you but I live right over there.” I point to a random house that I’ve walked by a thousand times. I’d rather die of pneumonia than tell him where I live. He could be a serial killer for all I know. He quirks an eyebrow and cocks his head. I think he knows I’m lying.

“Good. Then you won’t mind if I walk you to your door. After all, it’s my fault you’re soaking wet.” Wait. What? Does he think I’m drenched because of his inconsiderate disregard to the human population?

“I can assure you that I was soaked through long before you came along, sir.”

“The name’s Mike. ‘Sir’ belonged to my late father.” Okay, this is awkward. Do I give him my condolences?

“What I’m trying to say is, I went for a walk and I was drenched long before you came along, Mike. I absolve you of any blame.” I try closing the umbrella so I can give it back to him, but he places his hand over mine. Now my body’s trembling and it’s not from the cold. I’m several blocks from home and he’s very intimidating.

“Keep the umbrella. Once again, my apologies.” He crosses his arms in the pouring rain and waits. Mike wants me to walk inside of my home before leaving. He’s calling my bluff. Well, I guess I’m about to find out who lives there whether I want to or not.

Slowly, I walk towards the house. Umbrella in hand. The fear of the unknown about to bite me in the ass. Digging into my pocket, I nonchalantly pull out my keys. I’m glad Mike can’t see me biting on my lower lip as I pretend to place the key inside the lock. A door slams in the distance and my heart stutters when I turn around and see Mike pulling away from the curb. Oh, thank God. When it’s out of sight, I turn around and head towards the complex. Phew, that was close.

As soon as I feel the warmth of the lobby, I head straight for the elevator. This time I don’t give a thought about who I might run into because I’m focused on a nice warm bath and a glass of wine.

The metal doors slide open immediately when I hit the button and I’m relieved when I realize I’m the only passenger. When the doors begin to close, I let out a shaky breath I didn’t realize I was holding—until a beefy hand inches its way inside, forcing them apart. My heart thunders inside of my chest when I see a bald head appear. Mike! I don’t remember screaming until his hand covers my mouth. I’m fucked. Fight or flight kicks in and I start punching and kicking him as hard as I can. When he presses his body against mine, I try biting his hand.

“You dropped your wallet, Miss. Here, take it, but for god’s sake stop kicking and screaming.”

My whole body goes limp when I see him clutching my wallet. And as soon as I stop screaming, a relieved grin spreads across his face. He removes his hand and places the wallet on the floor. He backs away and presses the button. Not a word is spoken between us as he waits for the elevator doors to open. And when he steps outside, I slowly slide to the floor and watch the doors close securely behind him.

CHAPTER 2

ZANE

Today was supposed to be my day off but since I left early last night I need to go to work. I’ll go in, check out applications and then I’ll be out before anyone’s the wiser. Drew would kick my ass if he found out I stepped foot inside the club on my day off. Apparently, he thinks working eighty plus hours a week is too much for a young man like me. He feels I should be out playing with the ladies and getting laid. I certainly don’t object to his way of thinking, but I need to be very discreet. With my money, one wrong move and my life could come crashing down around me.

After showering, I throw on a pair of designer jeans and a long-sleeved Henley. I must admit, this is the only reason why I like taking a day off. Otherwise, I’d be stuck wearing a suit and tie again. Hell, if I didn’t have to go out I’d be barefoot, shirtless and lounging around in a pair of pajama bottoms. Ah, it’s the little things in life.

Traffic’s not too crazy at this time of day. By now, I guess everyone’s sitting at their desk or attending a business meeting. My goal is to be back at home within a few hours, tops. It shouldn’t take me more than an hour to glance through some résumés and set up a few interviews.

Thirty minutes later, I’m pulling into an empty parking lot. It’s kind of eerie, really.

After stepping inside, I deactivate the alarm and flip on a few switches to light my way. The mahogany bar gleams like polished glass against the dim lighting. Creating an exquisite contrast to the otherwise light and airy atmosphere. Having the beautifully rich wood imported from Fiji was money well spent. One of my best investments to date.

I begin pulling up applications immediately and berate myself for not sticking to the plan last night. Normally it takes hell freezing over for me to deviate but, clearly, I was rattled by what went down last night. Or should I say who went down last night. If I’m being honest, I still am. They were two of my best employees and a moment of lust cost them their jobs. Oh well, right now I need to shake it off because I can’t change a thing.

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