Page 888 of Not Over You

“The pictures still look gorgeous because the photographer edited everyone’s red eyes out of the photos,” Will adds to the story. They are perfect for each other and I’m thrilled for my friend.

“I’ll keep that in mind if I ever think of marrying at the Botanical Gardens,” I quip and signal the bartender to bring us another round. “Where do you guys live?” I ask.

“We just moved into an apartment on 13th and Avenue A in the West Village,” Will says with an eye roll and I know there’s a story there.

“No way, I live on 13th near there,” I say and we start talking about the neighborhood and I tell them all of my favorite local spots. Turns out they live one building down from mine.

“Of all the gin joints, Owen, I can’t believe I ran into you,” Tom says shaking his head in disbelief.

“Well, we are neighbors and I’m sure we will run into each other all the time now,” Will chimes in.

“I’m going to make kind of a sad confession,” I say, knowing Tom will get me. “These are all work people and if we exchange numbers then you will literally be my only real friend in the city.”

“That is really sad, but if you just went through law school then I understand that. If I hadn’t met Will while getting my Ph.D. then I probably never would have left my apartment or the library.”

“You guys seem happy,” I say, taking a long swig of beer.

“We are,” he says then leans in so only I can hear. “Really no word from Mollie?” he asks and I shake my head.

“No, and I accidentally saw her on her wedding day a few years ago, so that ship has sailed.” My tone is neutral but it took me a long time to get over seeing her that day.

“I hate that for you both. Not that I’d wish a pox on her marriage, but she’s clearly settled for someone lesser.”

“As much as it hurts to say, I hope not. She deserves someone who cherishes her and knows how amazing she really is.”

“I thought you would never forgive her for blowing you off.”

After I received the letter from Mollie’s mother, I called Tom. He and I kept in touch off and on through my freshman year by email because he wanted to make sure his ‘little lovebirds’ did okay. Before I called him, I drank about half of a bottle of tequila and was very riled up.

“Let’s say I’ve softened with age,” I say. “I only wish her well, despite how she broke my heart.”

Honestly, I don’t know if that’s true or not. In theory, I hope she’s off somewhere happy with a million babies in the suburbs. Out of sight out of mind, if you will. If she were to show up at this bar and sit down next to me, I’m not sure how I would react.

“You’re too good of a person, Owen Hart,” he says and after a beat we both crack up. “Oh my god, how did I even say that with a straight face?”

“Darling, you don’t have a straight face,” Will jokes and we all laugh.

CHAPTER 26

ALL THE THINGS

MOLLIE THEN

Never hearing from Owen crushes me. Freshman year was a disaster of epic proportions and if it wasn’t for my roommate, Natalie, I would have failed out. She became my rock and the two of us made plans for a wild Europe trip for the summer. Having this to look forward to is a good thing. It distracts me from the fact that I was not going to be working down the shore like I planned last summer with Owen, and it gives me a goal to work towards.

That summer as we took trains and traveled all over Europe, I found myself again. I kept a travel journal of all of our adventures and it brought the love of writing back to me. I was energized and inspired.

I decide to major in writing sophomore year and begin writing fantasy stories in journals my dad sent me. By the end of my sophomore year, I have about 30 journals filled with stories, ideas, sketches, and wild things from my imagination. I am addicted to filling these journals, there’s no stopping me. If I’m not studying, eating, or sleeping, I am writing. Sometimes Nat hides my pens so she can get me to go to a party.

My junior year I take a world-building class and my critique partner is a very cute guy named Steven. He loves fantasy almost as much as I do, but his major is business. It’s hard for him to take the class seriously as something that will help anyone’s career but I have fun trying to convince him that I’ll be a successful writer someday.

We start dating after the second week of class and by the middle of senior year we are engaged, then married a week after graduation. The engagement and marriage are a whirlwind and because of our ages, I think for sure my mom won’t approve. It might have even been a little part of the reason I said yes. Of course, instead, she is thrilled for us and is happy to help us plan a small wedding in the city.

Steven and I don’t fight a lot but we don’t really do much of anything. I am obsessed with becoming pregnant and it probably consumes most of the first seven years of our marriage. After those seven long years, we are thrilled to finally see a plus sign on that stick. Even though our marriage is already a little rocky, I am over the moon and so is he.

We make plans, paint the nursery a pretty dove gray, buy pretty ivory curtains and baby furniture. I make a little reading nook, and start a little library for our baby. She has a name, Fiona, meaning ‘fair’ in Irish. At around 22 weeks, I have some spotting, cramps, and don’t feel her move for a few hours so I go to the emergency room and end up staying in the hospital a few days. Unfortunately, they are unable to save my Fiona.

When I came home, empty and heart broken, the nursery is painted over, and all of the furniture gone. Steven converted it into a home office for himself, setting up a desk for me in his old space in our room. It is probably the nicest thing he’s ever done for me.