Page 21 of The Mobster's Nanny

I glance at the photo despite myself, and something in my chest tightens when I look at Sienna’s smiling face. Long dark hair, honey skin, big eyes, and a smile brighter than the sun—oh, sometimes I forget just how beautiful she was. I see the photo every day, of course, but I’m so used to it that I barely pay attention to it these days. But thanks to Liss, I actually take a moment to get a proper look at the photo that immediately brings back memories of our trip to Virginia.

God, it’s been only five years. Who would’ve thought thateverythingwould change?

“It is Romeo, isn’t it?” Liss’s voice pulls me out of my thoughts, and I blink and glance at her, catching her studying the photo with a thoughtful frown. I’m sure she’s smart enough to know who the people in the photo are, but she’s also very tactful in avoiding any questions about Sienna, and I admire her for it.

“Yes,” I say with a distant smile. I pick up the frame, holding it for both of us to see it better. “This is Romeo, this is me, and this is my wife, Sienna.”

“Oh,” Liss exhales under her breath, looking at our faces with renewed curiosity, and I can’t help but smile, watching her from the corner of my eye. “Is she…”

Liss doesn’t finish the question and only looks at me with a thoughtful frown, delivering her question in silence. I sigh quietly and give her a joyless smile before looking at Sienna again. In this photo, she is forever safe and happy, and it’s something I failed to keep when she was still with me.

“She’s dead,” I murmur, avoiding the details of her gruesome death—or rather, her murder. The day of the explosion flashes before my eyes, and I feel the old crippling guilt squeeze my heart. “I failed to keep her safe, I let everyone down, I—”

I catch myself. What am I doing? Liss doesn’t want to listen to me weeping about my old mistakes.

“Ah, it’s nothing, nevermind,” I say after a short pause, turning to give Liss a quick and apologetic smile. “Do you—”

But the look in Liss’s eyes makes me stop before I come up with an excuse to change topics. She’s looking at me with a sympathetic frown, the corners of her lips turned down, and when my gaze lingers on her Liss suddenly raises her hand to put it on my shoulder. And it’s nothing, it’s just a small gesture, but somehow it makes the weight of my failure easier.

“You’re being too hard on yourself,” she says quietly, still holding my gaze, and squeezes my shoulder. “I’m sure it wasn’t your fault.”

It was, of course it was! But the words of self-reprimand get stuck in my throat.

I don’t know if it’s Liss’s words, her gentle touch, or the sense of intimacy that pulls us even closer. I don’t know what it is, but I can’t find it in me to resist it. Warmth spreads through my body from Liss’s touch, and my head suddenly feels light, all proper thoughts escaping me, only my heart is beating stronger than ever.

It’s wrong, unprofessional, weird, overstepping, and a thousand other adjectives that still don’t stop me as I lean forward and kiss her lips.

I can feel Liss still in surprise, her hand instinctively squeezing me tighter, her lips parting with a quiet gasp. It catches her off guard, I know, but she doesn’t pull back, doesn’t push me away, and it sends a heated wave of thrill through my body. Does she want it? Does she like me too?

I close my eyes and, without holding myself back, wrap an arm around her waist, pulling her closer—and Liss yields into the touch, sighing into my lips. God, what a wonderfully obedient girl. A wave of satisfaction runs through my body, and I pat her waist to praise her before kissing her even deeper. Liss hums into the kiss, sliding her hand up my shoulder, and I feel like I could move mountains for her.

The desire to have her overtakes any other thoughts, and I ignore the sound of a notification from the computer, pushing her toward the desk. It’s been years since I had sex in my office, and it makes me feel like a horny teenager, but god, I—

“No, no, wait.”

Suddenly, Liss squeezes my shoulder, pushing me away and pulling herself back, panting into my lips. Why no? Why wait? I look at her, unfocused, catching my breath and feeling drunk on her smell. I know she wants it, I can see it in the blush on her cheeks and the dark look in her eyes, her body all but leaning into mine. So why—

“It’s wrong,” Liss murmurs and looks away, shaking her head. “No, it’s wrong, I—I shouldn’t.”

She pushes me away with more intention, and I give up, stepping back. As soon as the cool air touches my skin, the distance between our bodies clearing my mind, I feel a cold wave of realization washing over me. God, what have I done?

I close my eyes and rub my face, feeling like a total idiot. “Liss, I—”

But before I can finish the sentence I hear a rustle of clothes, hurried steps, and by the time I look up Liss is already closing the door behind her. Goddamnit. I groan under my breath and slump into the chair. I can’t believe I kissed my son’s nanny! Did I scare her? Does she think I’m a creep now?

But whatever Liss thinks, Iknowwhat I sensed. I know she wanted me, and even if it’s wrong and unprofessional, I can’t lie. I want her badly—but if Liss thinks it’s a bad idea, perhaps I have to stay away from her. She’s the best nanny Romeo has ever had, and I will never forgive myself if I ruin whattheyhave with my own desires.

So I breathe out, shake my head, and sit up straight, looking around. I need a gulp of cold water, and my bottle should be somewhere here…right? I check the desk a couple of times and frown. Damn, I’m sure I left it next to the laptop, but I can’t find it now. It couldn’t have disappeared!

In the end, I have to go to the kitchen to grab a glass of water, and I see Liss driving away. It’s too early to pick Romeo up, but I can’t help the feeling that she wants to avoid me. Damn it. No, I really have to hold myself back. Whatever feelings I have for her, they need to go away.

Easier said than done, huh? Especially when the source of my thoughts and feelings is right in front of me every day.

I don’t know if it would be easier to stop thinking about Liss if she wasn’t living with us, but as it is…god, I feel like it’s only getting worse.

Whenever I see her in the morning, looking cozy and lovely in her pajamas, a wave of warmth spreads through my entire body and I have to force myself to leave the kitchen. The image of cornering her against the wall, threading my fingers through her hair, and pushing her head back to kiss her lips—ah, it's too strong to ignore.

It doesn’t help me that Liss seems to be more affected by my presence as well. She doesn’t show it, but I can see her glancing at me more often than usual, and when Romeo isn’t around the air between us glimmers with tension. We pretend like nothing has changed, but every time our eyes meet, it’s as if she’s seeing directly through my soul.