Page 234 of Murder

And so, of course, it has to happen that he wakes up on a Wednesday night—the first night I’ve been booked to sing at the Bluebird in almost five years.

I get the text when I dig in my purse for my car keys, after. I’m already sweaty and exhilarated, so when I see Cleo’s words, I nearly pass dead out.

Barrett’s awake!!!!!!!! Don’t come back yet though. They have to do a few things first. I’ll keep you posted!!! :D

What the fuck?

Just…what the fuck?

I drive straight to the hospital. Cleo can sit on a cactus. When I get near his room, I bump into Kellan on his way out. I know something’s wrong the second his gaze touches mine.

“…Gwenna.”

My knees are so shaky, I’m forced to grab his arm. Compassion overtakes the weirdness in his eyes. He leads me not into Bear’s room, but over to a hallway chair.

“Sit down.”

“I don’t want to sit down! Kellan…”

“He’s okay. He’s doing great. Ray the PT was in there and Barrett didn’t like the way Ray moved his left hand.” Kellan’s eyes widen. “He could feel it.”

“His left hand?”

He nods. “Not sure if it’s all the way or what. He’s pretty sleepy, but he said some things to Ray and asked ‘What’s this shit in my nose?’ and tried to pull the NG tube out.” Barrett chuckles. “He did pull it out. It’s gone. He’s drinking juice.”

My pulse surges. “What’s the catch?”

Kellan’s eyes dart down to his feet. I see his jaw flex. “Gwen… He asked where Lyon was. He remembered when I told him. He asked how I got cleared to come to Germany.”

“He thought he was at Landstuhl.”

“Yeah.”

“Is that a problem? Does that mean—”

“After a few minutes, he remembered what happened. With Nic.”

“You’re scaring me! What aren’t you saying, Kellan?”

“He called you Snowflake. He said, ‘that girl. The snowflake girl.’ I started to ask him what that meant and he said the one with red hair. I told him you were okay, and he tried to ask about the accident. We kept telling him you were okay, but he got upset. They weren’t going to give him anything but they ended up giving him a small amount of Xanax. When we asked if he wanted to see you, to see Gwen, he told us no. I’m so sorry, Gwen. It might be different tomorrow. But tonight, they want us all to go. He’s very tired, he’s sleeping. I’ve woken up after a long sleep before, and trust me, he’s not going to be looking for us. I doubt he’s even quite that with it yet. They think that this is big for him. Hell, it’s amazing. They just want us to leave him starting now until sometime in the morning. Let the nurses and the doctors check him over. See if he’ll wake up in another few hours and say more then.”

My throat is so tight, when I try to speak, nothing comes out. “You would leave him?” I manage.

Kellan’s face goes gentle. “He’s my brother, Gwen. I’m not saying we go far. We can stay at that hotel across the street. If he wakes up again and asks for us, we come right over.”

I open my mouth and try go get some air into my lungs. “Did he remember you?”

“He did.”

“Cleo?” I rasp.

“Yes. He remembered Cle.”

My voice wavers. “He didn’t ask for me?”

“That’s why I didn’t want you to go in just yet. He had the Xanax, now he’s sleeping. If you get upset Gwen, Barrett might, too.”

“No he won’t! Not if he doesn’t remember me. He called me Snowflake New Year’s Eve! In 2012.” I grab onto Barrett’s wrist. He wraps his arm behind my back. “If he didn’t call me Gwen or Pig, he doesn’t know me! Kell, I have to know! I have to know if he knows who I am…” Against my will, I start to cry.

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