Page 53 of Desiring Boss Daddy (Cascade Mountain)

Did I know which terminal I needed? Absolutely not. But I knew I could figure it out, that I could figure out.

There was more of a process than I had anticipated with the ticket counter, security, and everything else, but regardless, I was seated at the gate that would take me back to where I came from. Escape was just a few feet away from my chair.

I had enough time that I could’ve gone roaming around the terminal or hunting for something to eat within these utilitarian walls and décor, but the siren’s call of New York City kept me planted in my seat, ready for a change. Or ready to go back to what I’d known before, even if that had all changed again.

I was gutted irreversibly and unsure of who I was anymore. The professional part of my brain knew I was disassociating, that I had been so shocked and undone, I couldn’t stand to be inside my own head. Everything felt like a dream, and it was like I was only a spectator as my own body stumbled around in search of relief.

Watching myself call for a ride to the airport, my words to the driver coming from far away, and following the directions through the airport to my gate, ticket in hand, but far away. Now, everything was catching up to me, and all I wanted to do was be in the air, getting the hell out of here before I could let myself feel as miserable as I suspected I did. Right now, I just needed a brave face to protect myself a little longer and to make sure no one around me suspected just how awful I felt.

It wasn’t enough that I was sorry for myself. I was sorry for Graham and Collins. If possible, I was even more heartbroken now than I had been when Charlie and Shauna took everything away from me.

I didn’t think Josie was better than me. Sure, she was Collins’ mother, but only in the most basic biological understanding of the term. I just couldn’t play the game she was trying to play with me. I was too shattered, too lost.

I couldn’t stop shivering even though the airport wasn’t that cold. I was probably still in shock. Three people, including a security officer, offered me blankets or jackets, but I could only shake my head, my arms clutched tightly around myself as I counted the minutes until my flight boarded.

I expected to be detained because I couldn’t get control of myself and couldn’t stop the tears that flowed unobstructed down my face. I’d been hurt again, but this time, my tenuous spirit had been absolutely smashed. There was no well of strength I could dip into because it had run completely dry.

I expected to be told I couldn’t get on the plane unless I got it together—the tears flowed like a broken dam, and there was no repairing it.

As much as boarding the plane was my form of escape, I knew there was nothing waiting for me at my destination because I had made sure there could be nothing—no apartment, no friends, no fiancé, no one to love, no one who loved me, no career, and no life left there.

Still, that utter nothingness was a better alternative than the open wound this place was to me now. I could start over in New York. Plenty of people with fewer advantages than me did so every day. I’d make new friends, get new clients, and leverage my connections.

But I would never love again. That part of me was dead.

My thoughts twisted and turned, and I knew I was spiraling and becoming unraveled. I was close to breaking down completely, but I had to keep going. I had to get out of here.

As everyone around me stood when the boarding groups were called to the departure gate, I did so, too—numbly, automatically, and like some kind of zombie or puppet. My strings were being pulled by some source that I couldn’t see, and my arms and legs reacted belatedly, staggering across the floor to get to where I thought things could be better.

Disassociation was my self-defense mechanism, and it was trying to transport me to whatever safety I could find, even if the only thing I had to my name was my bag and the clothes I was wearing.

But here’s what I didn’t expect: Graham striding down the concourse toward me, the gold flecks in his green eyes blazing even from a distance.

He was here to save everything, here to save me from myself.

23

Graham

My pulse roared in my ears as I pushed the Tesla faster than it had ever gone before. It was an excellent car, and I normally enjoyed driving it, but right now, all I needed it to do was get me to the airport as quickly as possible.

I’d gotten back to the house, shaken by my encounter with Josie, but certain the nightmare was over. However, all I’d found was chaos, Jason and Lauren scrambling to contact me after I’d just missed Heather leaving.

“Josie got to her,” Lauren said, hanging on my arm. “What happened? What’s going on?”

“Josie sent her a series of messages,” Jason elaborated, looking weary and worried. “We didn’t get a chance to look at them closely, and we couldn’t stop Heather. She was in the middle of having an utter breakdown. I think one of them was a photo.”

“Fuck. That fucking bitch.” In a single instance, whatever string that had still tied me to Josie was severed. There was no more platonic, everlasting love for the woman who had given me Collins, and no dull spark of appreciation for the contribution she’d made—however briefly—to one of the most precious things in my life: my daughter.

Josie was nothing to me, especially when she had hurt the woman I loved almost more than anything else in my life.

“Where?” I barked at them. “Where is she going?”

“I don’t know,” Lauren said, tears filling her eyes. “I’m so worried, and I’m so, so sorry, Graham. We tried to stop her, but she was just out of her mind. I don’t know what she saw.”

“Josie assaulted me,” I said, hating the taste of those words in my mouth even if they rang of truth. “She bribed one of my new drivers, ambushed me in the back of my own car, and took advantage of the situation. I’m sure she somehow got to Heather as it’s not that hard to figure out someone’s cellphone number.”

“That had to be it,” Lauren murmured, looking haunted. “Josie snapped a photo of the two of you and sent it to Heather.”

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