Page 12 of Where is Amber? (Before Us)

“It wasn’t as though he was going to share them.”

“Amber.”

“What?”

“A sex tape! I don’t even have one of those. Not for lack of trying on Todd’s part, but still.”

We sat in silence for a moment—me, unable to find it in me to be ashamed, and her deliberating my next move. I would never have believed I’d tell anyone about those tapes. They’d always been so private, my absolute belief that they were confidential unerring. If anyone ever saw one of them, Eric would lose his job, tenure, and whole career. No one would want him teaching in their university when he was considered a liability around students.

“You can’t call him here,” Kenzie finally said, reaching for her coffee. “When you do, I want it to be on speaker.”

“Why?”

“Have you ever heard of the term grooming?” Kenzie asked, not a hint of humor on her features.

I shook my head. “It wasn’t like that.”

“I’m not so sure.” Kenzie rose and circled the small table to sit next to me on the couch.

“Kenz, this is ridiculous.”

“Maybe I’m wrong. Maybe I’m not. I just want to be sure he doesn’t make you feel guilty for living your life,ormanipulate you into doing what he wants.”

“And you think you’re qualified to spot whether I’ve been groomed or not?”

“God, no. I just think you need backup. I didn’t even know something like that existed until I read a script about it a couple of months ago. It was a student and teacher movie, and I declined it, but the whole thing sounded similar to your situation.”

“So, you think because he was my professor, he had to coerce me into fucking him? You did see him at my graduation, right?”

A ghost of a smile appeared on her lips. “Eric’s hot, I’m not denying that, but he was also a giant prick.”

“He was my professor. It’s not like I could introduce him as my lover.”

Kenzie stayed quiet, staring at me as she waited for me to bend to her will. I wasn’t sure I could see what she did. When I looked back over my relationship, there wasn’t a time I felt like Eric manipulated me in any way. In the end, I was the one who gave in—more than anything to prove to her that she was wrong.

We drove backto Kenzie and Todd’s house in The Hills. Noah and I were staying in Noah’s hill house rather than in Malibu because it was more challenging for the press to get close to us. Todd was out filming his newest movie, and Kenzie’s assistant was running an errand, so it was just the two of us.

I was beginning to regret my agreement to do this on speaker.

“Is this necessary?” I asked, juggling my phone from one hand to another as I paced in front of the closed accordion doors.

“I think it is. Press asking college professors and teachers questions about students who suddenly find themselves in the limelight is more normal than you’d think. You remember, they asked Mrs. Freeman if I was an outstanding drama student, and if she thought she deserved credit for my talent.”

“She didn’t even mention you were in AV rather than theater.”

Kenzie threw up her hands as though to saypoint made.

There was no reason for further argument, so I sat on the enormous ottoman facing her and pulled up Eric’s number. He was listed as Professor Wright in my phone.

“Amber, where the hell have you been? I’ve been calling you for almost a week,”he said down the line, bypassing any pleasantries. I winced, while Kenzie looked validated.

“I was on a yacht in the Pacific. I turned my phone off.”

“Funny,” he replied in a cold voice. There was silence for a few beats, Kenzie and I looking at one another expectantly. When he spoke again, his tone was under more control and gentle. “I was worried about you.”

“I’m sorry.”

I winced when Kenzie slapped my thigh with an open palm. She pointed at me, then the phone, and then back to me like I was supposed to translate her erratic behavior. I held my palms up in question, but she only scowled at me.

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