My heart stuttered at the word love. I know we had proclaimed our love to each other in Italy, but was it true love?
Maybe I let the whole situation get the better of me. Maybe I didn't really understand real love. I mean, I never really saw romantic love in action because Dad left so early and Mom's never really had anyone else in her life. Not anyone I knew about.
So maybe I really had no reference point.
I couldn’t think about that now, though. That was a thought to mull over as I stared at the ceiling in the middle of the night, unable to sleep.
“Thank you,” I whispered instead, surprised that I truly meant it. There was something so powerful about having your mom validate all of your feelings. Especially when you always felt like she favored your brother.
"Promise me something, Simone," she said, her eyes glistening. "Promise me that you'll be honest with your brother.He loves you more than anything, and he deserves to know the truth."
"I promise, Mom," I vowed, touched by her concern for both Seth and me. "I'll tell him as soon as I get back."
Chapter 18
Hugo
Istood in Seth and Simone’s living room, taking in the modern furniture that screamed Seth. Sure, there were touches of Simone here and there – some art on the walls that Seth definitely didn’t pick out, framed photos on the fireplace mantel, fresh flowers on the coffee table – but it was mostly Seth and for some reason, it made my heart hurt for Simone. It was clear she was struggling to find her place in the world, and it showed in her living space.
I scanned the photos on the mantel. They captured moments of Seth, Simone and their family. Despite the clean lines of the modern furniture, warm, soft lighting created an inviting atmosphere. It wasn’t necessarily cold; it was mostly efficient. Which was exactly how I thought of Seth.
“Hugo,” Seth said, pulling me into a one-armed hug and slapping my back. “Make yourself at home.”
He handed me a beer and I sat down on the couch. I felt my body relax just in time to tense up again as Simone walked into the room. Her eyes sparkled when she saw me and she immediately sank down on the couch next to me, her own beer in hand.
Seth had a ball game on TV but ignored it to ask about the practice and my work. That was all I had to talk about, anyway.
That was a lie.
I came here because I wanted to convince Simone to move in with me. We talked about it briefly at the beginning of all of this, but never seemed to close the loop on it. I was hoping she’d agree that it made sense. With my work schedule, I barely saw her outside of work these days and it was driving me crazy.
“So, Simone,” I said, trying desperately to sound casual. “I was wondering if you would want to move into my place.” I added quickly, “You know, temporarily. Just to make everything seem more believable.”
Simone’s eyes widened slightly and she glanced nervously toward Seth, but her lips pulled up in that beautiful smile of hers. I risked a glance at Seth and saw him looking at me curiously.
“I think that sounds like a smart move,” Simone said cautiously. “It would definitely make this whole arrangement seem more believable.”
Seth was still looking at me and was silent for an extra beat.
“I’m gonna miss you around here, Simone,” he finally said. “But I guess it would be nice to have an extra room back. I can finally have the game room I’ve been dreaming about since buying this place.”
Simone threw a pillow at him, but he swiftly caught it as she laughed at him.
Despite the siblings’ light behavior, I could feel the weight of guilt settling heavily on my chest. Seth's opinion mattered tome, but he didn't know the whole truth about us. My brows furrowed, and I frowned, unable to shake the feeling that I should be fully honest with him.
But I didn’t have a clue how to tell Seth that my relationship with his sister was not as transactional as he thought. I was pretty sure I was in love with her. What I knew for sure, is I wanted to spend as much time with her as possible.
"Hugo, are you okay?" Seth's concerned voice snapped me out of my thoughts.
“Yep, I’m totally fine. Just tired. It was a long day.”
Seth looked at me for another moment. He just kept looking at me like he could see right through me. Whatever he saw, he also decided that now wasn’t the time to talk about things.
“I hear that, man. I’ve been getting my ass kicked lately. Tonight is the first time I'm home before midnight in a long while.”
“Oh, poor Seth,” Simone mocked in a sing-song voice. The laughter that burst from her lips betrayed the venomous words. Something tugged at my heart seeing these two. I always knew they were close, but I didn’t see them together all that often. But it was clear that they were incredibly important to each other and I felt like even more of an asshole for lying to Seth about my feelings for his sister.
Simone seemed to sense the whirlwind of thoughts and tension that I was feeling and kept the conversation light. She mostly engaged with Seth, leaving me with my thoughts, and I was grateful for the break.