Page 29 of Be My Endgame

Since it looked like, at least tonight, Lee would volunteer no more than he already had, Alex didn’t fight the pull of a yawn. “Guess we should get some sleep, right?”

“Right.” Hands in his lap, Lee seemed to be waiting for something.

Alex arched an eyebrow. “What?”

“Don’t you want to go back to your own room?”

“Why?”

“Uh.” Lee tilted his head, a small wrinkle between his eyebrows. “Kind of obvious, I’d think?”

Alex blinked at him. “Do youwantme to go back to my room?”

“Well, I mean … not necessarily.” Lee’s voice tilted up at the end just enough to hint at a question mark. “Only if it’s more comfortable for you.”

God, Alex should tell him—wipe that air of uncertainty off Lee’s face. But even if Alex had been straight, he rather hoped he wouldn’t have been a dick about it.

“You don’t make me uncomfortable.”Tell him. Alex bit down on the inside of his cheek, the sting of pain settling the buzzing in his ears, and no, he just—no. Not tonight. “Also,” he continued, “we’ll go back to regularly sharing a room tomorrow, plus locker rooms, showers, all that stuff. Unless you want me to tip everyone off, I’m not going to change how I act around you.”

It was damn near heartbreaking, the way Lee’s eyes filled with gratitude. “Thank you.”

Bloody hell, now Alex felt like a fraud. Maybe because he was one, kind of—meeting Lee’s honesty with omitted truth.

“No need,” he said quietly and moved on before Lee could respond. “How many people know? About you.”

“On the team? Just Oliver.” Lee smiled slightly, and Christ, he was gorgeous—his plush mouth at odds with the strong line of his jaw and his prominent cheekbones, dark eyes warm. “And you, of course. Beyond that, my sisters and my ex. That’s it.”

Five people, compared to Alex’s total of zero.

“Thank you for trusting me. And” —Alex hesitated— “for talking me down a bit last night. I may owe Kieran for putting us in the same room.”

“Me too.” Lee’s voice was gruff. “And you played well today, by the way. You belong on that pitch, and if your parents disagree? Screw ‘em.”

“It’s not really about how well I play, you know?” Alex tugged the sheet into his lap. “It’s like… Imagine if Prince Joshua decided to join the Premier League—not quite suited to his role, is it?”

Lee cut Alex a sly look. “You’re no prince, mate.”

“I realise that.” Alex shrugged. “Not entirely sure my parents do, though. My father in particular.”

Lee took a moment to consider it. “Sounds fucking exhausting,” he said then. “My mum may not be in the running for any kind of parenting award, but at least she never tried to take over my life. Why do you put up with it?”

Jeff had asked Alex the same thing, more than once, but with more swear words involved. Alex’s answer was identical, though. “Because they’re the only parents I have.”

Something shifted in Lee’s expression, and when he spoke again, it was low. “Yeah, okay. I get that.”

Maybe he did, in a way that Jeff couldn’t because Jeff’s family might be loud and chaotic, but they’d help each other hide any body, any day.

A silent second spun out between them, then Alex dipped his head with a smile. “Sleep?”

He didn’t wait for a reply before he wiggled down the mattress and pulled the sheet up to somewhere around his belly, then sent Lee an expectant look.

With a small delay, Lee slid under his own sheet, and the bed really was massive, leaving plenty of space between them. Alex had shared beds with Jeff before during away games, so really, this wasn’t all that out of the ordinary. Except… Except tonight, sharing had been a conscious choice rather than circumstances beyond their control. Still, though. Nothing that unusual. Most of their teammates had partners or other family over because it wasn’t the night to be alone, not when the roar of the crowd was still ringing faintly in Alex’s ears. It presented a counterpoint to the familiar sounds of Lee fluffing up his pillow and settling on his side even though Alex had learned that he’d be on his back come morning.

“Good night,” Alex mumbled.

Lee flicked off the bedside lamp, plunging the room into darkness. “Good night, Alex.” The words were laced with a new kind of warmth, or maybe just an openness that hadn’t existed before. It wasn’t entirely balanced, though. Not while Alex was holding back.

Some other time, maybe.

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