My father has been my biggest champion for the past two months. Never pushing me to talk, but always being there when I need him.
I can only imagine how scary it is, me being the last one without a child. Without a man in my life. And now, here I am, crossing that threshold much sooner than any of us anticipated.
Still. He’s unflinchingly proud.
“And I’m so excited for the next steps in her life as she becomes a mother.”
All the room’s eyes are on me. But it might as well just be my dad and me.
“It’s going to be amazing,” he says with sparkling eyes.
I blink and tears run down my cheeks. Happy tears.
Itisgoing to be amazing.
And I’m tired of this shame tainting it.
I touch the top of my bump and slide my hand down, the fabric showing the outline of my stomach if only for a moment.
It’s a start. Baby steps. No pun intended.
“So, a toast to Kira and the next great adventure!”
The room holds their glasses aloft. Gillian whispers, “Cheers!” in my ear as they toast.
I laugh, blush. I’m not used to being the center of attention like this. Admittedly, it’s nice.
“How’s my favorite witch doing?” Gillian asks, pulling me away to a quiet corner.
I giggle. “Good. By the way, what’s your costume?”
Gillian looks like her normal self: boho dress, long waving locks. Just topped with a flower crown. “I’m a child of the summer of sixty-nine.”
“So, you forgot to come up with a costume and just donned a flower crown and –”
“Hey, hey, hey. Don’t be rude. I was preoccupied.”
I glance over at Axel and Stella. They’ve paired up as Holmes and Watson, with Stella pretending to smoke a wooden pipe and Axel wearing a pair of fake glasses and a stethoscope around his neck.
“True. I bet your job was to outsource a lot of that, huh?”
Gillian smiles. “They’re cute, right?”
I swallow.Don’t be jealous. Don’t be jealous.
As if reading my mind, Gillian touches my shoulder. “Hey. I’ve been in your shoes.”
“Yeah, but at least not all of your sisters were booed up as the kids say,” I say with a snort.
“Sure, I won’t claim to know what that feels like, Kira. Not at all. But I was really young and…you have your feet under you. I’m not saying either of us had it easier or better. I just want to let you know I’m here for you when the walls are closing in.Because, trust me, when the baby comes, you’ll be feeling the best and worst emotions of your life.”
I sigh heavily and touch the top of my stomach again. “I really hope it’s more good than bad.”
“Oh, it is, it is. It’s so…” Gillian looks over at Stella again. The little girl has whipped out a magnifying glass and is peering into baby Mia’s face. I’m shocked at how good of a sleeper the one-month-old is. “It’s the best. But that doesn’t mean it’s not hard.”
“Did you ever –” I falter. Any time I think about Mom in the presence of my sisters, I feel guilty. Like I’m inviting bad energy into the room. “Worry you’d be bad at it?”
“Of course. It’s only natural.”