Page 107 of Prelude To You

“You know he probably likes you too. I mean that note he left, oh my God. And he bought you that thing…”

“Cameo.”

“Right. Which you gave back.”

“What the hell am I going to wear that to? And where do I keep a $110,000 cameo safe?”

Meg’s mouth opened and closed. She shook her head as if to clear cobwebs and make sure she heard right. “Wait a goddamn minute… Did you say $110,000?”

“Yes, it’s really beautiful.”

“You see when you said pricey, I was ballparking it at a few thousand, like that book he bought you. Not $110,000.”

“And he said when looked at me, that was what he saw.”

Meg abandoned the expense report and stared at me. “Oh my God, he said that to you?”

I nodded. “Now you understand. I’m the fool here. It turns out the one person I lost my head over, played me like a cheap violin.”

“Jesus, Isabel,” Meg insisted. “I don’t know this guy, but it sounds like he kinda cares.”

“Then why am I sitting here feeling like my heart was ripped out and thrown to the wolves? After he told me there was no future, I was ready to leave, I swear. But then things changed, and it felt like everything was meant to be.”

“I wish I could tell you it’s all going to be okay,” Meg said, wiping more tears from my face. “But it’s probably going to take a while to feel better. Just tell me this, did you manage to get a last name, a number, anything?

“No Meg,’ I sobbed. “It was pretty clear I wasn’t included in his future plans. I mean why the hell would I even want to know?”

“It’s probably not the worst idea to look this guy up and make sure—”

“Oh God, stop, just stop. He wants nothing to do with me. And I definitely shouldn’t want to have anything to do with him at this point.”

Meg cradled my hand in hers. “Listen, I feel kinda responsible for all this. I was the one who told you to go.”

“It’s not your fault, I have a mind of my own,” I said, knowing how many chances I’d had to walk away from Roman. All of them ignored, scattered to the vast emptiness of the universe, along with my decency and ability to reason.

Worst of all, I knew I’d do it all again. The trouble wasn’t spending those few magical hours with Roman, all of it nicely tied up in a small bundle markedMemories to dwell on for an eternity. The real trouble was that deep inside I knew this couldn’t end here, in this murky cloud of regret and despair.

It was my complete state of denial where the trouble settled down and nurtured itself into a full-blown refusal to accept the fact that Roman was not as emotionally invested in this as I was. Only when I was willing to accept that he was just a guy who saw me as a challenge, and played me until he got his way, would it be possible to move on. And the day that happened couldn’t come soon enough.

“And you know what,” I said. “If I didn’t forget my phone in the car last night, none of this shit would have happened. I would have called you and come home.”

“Yeah Felix found it in the backseat. He left it on the table for you.”

Meg gently wiped my face clean. “Let’s get you to bed. You should try to get a few hours sleep. You need to be fresh for your new job. Okay?”

She took me to my bed and tucked me in. I didn’t realize how exhausted I was until my head hit the pillow. I was asleep before she left the room. It was a restless sleep, filled with dreams of Roman that distorted into nightmares.

And when Meg woke me up four hours later, at 7AM, she gave me the once-over. “Go and take a shower, make it cold for at least two minutes. I’ll make coffee and fry you an egg. Let’s not send you to your new job looking like a mourning zombie, okay.”

The shower spray hitting my body highlighted every tender spot Roman had touched and kissed. I closed my eyes against the memories but as hard as I tried, they replayed ruthlessly in my head. I didn’t even realize I was crying again.

“Isabel?” Meg called from behind the closed bathroom door.

I swallowed my tears. None of what happened was anyone’s fault but my own, and the sooner I took responsibility, the sooner I’d manage to get over it. If only I could forget I’d ever met Roman, everything would be fine. “I’ll be done in a second,” I blurted out, trying to sound more in control than I was.

“You’re not crying again, are you?” Meg asked. I could hear the genuine concern in her voice, and I felt terrible for making her worry.

“No, everything’s okay,” I said, though we both knew I was lying. I turned down the warm water, and the sudden stream of ice-cold water had me gasping for breath.

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