Page 95 of Thoroughly Pucked

“Oh, shit. Didn’t mean to worry you,” he says, then reaches for my hand.

I sit next to him, somewhat mollified but still curious.

“There’s something I want to do for Dev tomorrow. But it’s going to take a lot of planning, so I want to see if you’re interested.”

He’s speaking my language now. “Tell me.”

He shares his idea and I nearly bounce. But then I say, “But I can’t afford that.”

Ledger sighs, then tucks his finger under my chin. “Aubrey, you need to stop worrying about money. I don’t expect you to pay for this. I don’t want you to pay for it. I just want to do it with you. Do you get that?”

Finally, I think I do.

The imbalance has been all in my head. It comes from my worries about being good enough.

Being happy enough.

Being entertaining enough.

The fear stems from the same place—am I interesting enough to keep a family together?

Only, I don’t have to do that with these guys.

I flash back over the last five days, picturing the grape stomping, the ghost town, the plant shop, the grilled cheese, the dinners, the hot tub, the hikes, even the amusement park, and all the conversations.

All the moments that we’ve spent together.

Iamgiving so much to them. I’m giving time. I’m giving myself. I’m giving enough.

I can see it in their eyes. I can hear it in their voices. I can feel it in my own heart.

“I understand.” Then, with new confidence, I say, “Let’s do it.”

43

NOSE BREAKERS

Dev

“Almost there,” Aubrey says as Ledger maneuvers the car onto the next street, heading toward the outskirts of the city.

I can’t wait. “I love surprises,” I say, rubbing my palms together. That’s all they told me this morning—that they had a surprise for me.

That was all I needed to know. I was sold. Now it’s early afternoon, and I’m buzzing with anticipation as Ledger drives us farther away from downtown.

“Of course you love surprises,” Ledger says dryly as I glance out the window at the Vancouver neighborhood. Something about the curve in the road feels familiar. It tickles my brain. Wait. Imightknow where we’re going. Pretty sure I’ve been here.

But I don’t know why we’re going now. I keep it to myself though.

In the passenger seat, Aubrey nods at Ledger in agreement. “Surprises suit Dev.”

But what about her? I lean forward, curling a hand around the back of her seat. “You like surprises, Aubs?”

“Good surprises,” she says, hedging her bets.

“Everyone likes good surprises,” Ledger says with a harrumph.

“I bet Aubrey could get you a brand-new money tree plant and you’d be like ‘I hate surprises.’”

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