Page 38 of Lost Boy

I could see how much pain Hunter was in while she was in a coma after her asthma attack. I just wanted her to open her beautiful eyes and wake up. And finally … she has.

Though I’ve been so consumed with everything going on with Sutton, I haven’t missed the little gifts being left outside my bedroom door during the past week—like random candy and other treats I love. And since Watson doesn’t know my favorite things and has been too busy with Ryann, I know who’s been leaving them. Cade.

Being near Cade hurts me but makes me feel good too. It hurts because I’m only allowed to get so close to him. But,sometimes, being in his presence feels like a gift. Something about him brings me comfort.

I’d planned to find a place to move to, but after Sutton’s stint in the hospital, that plan went on the back burner for a bit. Now that she’s better, it’s time for me to start searching.

Pulling my car into a parking spot, I glance up at the brick building and smile. Today, when I visit Sutton, I won’t just be talking to her while she’s being kept alive by tubes and machines. Today, I’ll get to actually talk to my friend. And she’s going to be just fine.

On the ride home, I feel lighter. I turn the music up a little louder than usual and let it filter through my car. I even put the window down halfway.

Sutton couldn’t talk too much during my visit because her throat was sore from over a week of intubation. But we got to visit for most of the afternoon, and it felt a lot like old times. Only now, she and my brother are in love instead of enemies. Who am I kidding? I think they have always been in love and just didn’t realize it.

Pulling into my parking spot, I notice that only Cade’s truck is home. I debate for a moment that maybe I should leave until Watson or Hunter come home, but then I realize I’m being silly, and I get my ass out of the car and head inside.

Once I get into the house, my eyes sweep the room, but I don’t see him anywhere downstairs. He must be in his room, which is fine by me because I don’t want to see him anyway. Not really.

The first thing I want to do is take my jeans off and put on sweatpants, so I head up the stairs, glancing down at my phone as I push the door open.

When I look up, my jaw drops, and my heart stops as I stare at my wall. A wall that had absolutely nothing on it now has a beautiful baby-blue three-bay bookcase. There aren’t any books in it, but my boxes of books are sitting next to them. It’s the most gorgeous sight I’ve ever seen, but it also infuriates me.

Marching across the hallway, I pound on Cade’s closed door.

Within moments, he opens it, shirtless and in sweatpants. I try to keep my eyes on his and not let them float downward. Which I fail to do … miserably.

I wave my arm toward my open bedroom door. “What the hell is that, Cade?”

“What is what?” He leans against the door, his eyes burning into mine.

“The bookcase. No, thebluebookcase!” I shake my head. “You’re the only person I’ve ever told about wanting a baby-blue bookcase. Well, you and Remi. And she isn’t the type of chick to build a damn bookcase. Especially not one this size.”

“Who says I’m the type of guy to do it then?” He shrugs. “I might not even own any tools. Hell, I might not even know how to measure.”

“So, you didn’t do it then?” I raise an eyebrow, folding my arms over my chest.

“No, I did,” he answers lightly. “You’re welcome, by the way.”

“Why?”

“Because you’ve had a rough week. I figured it would make you happy.” Holding his hands out, he widens his eyes. “Excuse me for trying to do something to make you smile, grumpzilla.”

“Ilovewhen you do nice things, Cade! But guess what comes after your nice shit. Not-so-nice shit. Every single time.” I stomp my foot. “You keep dangling that carrot in front of me. Almostmaking me feel like …” I pause, gripping the back of my neck with my hand. “You know what? Never mind.”

As I start to turn, he catches my hand and spins me toward him and crowds me against his doorframe. One hand rests above my head, and the other moves to my cheek. “Almost making you feel like what, angel?”

I look up at him, embarrassed to say what I’m about to say. “Like I have a shot,” I whisper, barely hearing myself. “Like maybe, just maybe, you might care.”

He dips his head closer, making my brain feel fuzzy and my skin prickle. The power he holds over me from the slightest touch is pathetic.

“I might have a shitty way of showing it, but I promise you … I care more than I’ve ever cared before, Haley.” His hand continues to cup my face as his eyes look into mine. “I care so much that it makes me crazy sometimes.”

“How can you say that?” I squeak, my voice growing hoarse. “You don’t even remember …” I stop, feeling tears stinging my eyes before one escapes.

He brushes my cheek, wiping the tear away. “I remember everything,” he rasps. “Always have.”

“Y-you do?” I utter, frowning. “But you said—”

“I know what I said. I’m no good for you. I’ve got demons, Haley. Ones that you aren’t equipped to battle. Nor should you have to.” His nostrils flare with emotion, and he shakes his head the slightest bit. “You’re too fucking perfect to be ruined by me. I can’t do it. I’d never forgive myself.”

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