Page 36 of 5000 Nights of Obsession

Axelretreated insideChateauat theHempsteadwith promises of libations and more blankets.

Afterthe strip club, we went to an adult cinema.Icouldn’t stop giggling at the ridiculous notion of grown men jerking off inside a theater.Hadthey never heard of internet porn from the comfort of their home?Welasted five minutes beforeIcaught some dude’s attention, and an infuriatedAxeldragged me out.Wegot into another argument, andItold him to go toHell.Heresponded by throwing me over his shoulders again.

Next, we landed at aBDSMclub.Theylet us in without the usual vetting process becauseAxelknew someone.Itwas the only place he was well behaved as voyeurism consisted of limited interaction with others.Wewalked along a hallway lined with two-way mirrors, giving us a peek into various unobserving patrons frenzied by their niche of fetish.Roomafter room of leather, whips, and chains had been forever ingrained in my brain.Itmade me realizeIhad no kinks.NothingIsaw turned me on.Theonly thing heating my insides was the man walking beside me with his all-consuming presence.

Aswe exited the building,Axelinsisted we break for food.Mygrowling stomach didn’t put up a fight sinceImissed the dinner portion of the reception.Iwas stumped that he remembered, whereas he was amazedInever hadNewYorkjumbo-slice pizza.

Twogiant-sized slices later,Idragged him to a male strip club, another seedy establishment with questionable hygiene.Wewere cast out afterAxelstarted a fight with a male stripper for getting too close.Itold him he was insane.Hetold meIwas a brat.Ismacked him over the head, and once more, he threw me over his shoulders.

Ispent mere hours with this man, yet it felt like days had passed from the rush of the night.Axeljoined the debauchery in crossing off the items on my list, andIgot the distinct feeling he enjoyed it equally.Uponprodding, he mentioned what his bucket list items would hold.Axel’slist sounded evil rather than thrill-seeking like mine because he was a heathen, after all.Prank-calling an old college roommate.Convincingsomeone he was from the future to make them do terrible things.Speakin a made-up language in public.Jumpinto a taxi and scream, “follow that car.”Thosesorts of things.

Unlikethe men from my past,Axelhad been adamant about paying my way throughout the night and wouldn’t let me pick up a single tab.Hewasn’t intimidated, either, upon hearing my family would reject him before meeting him.Itstirred an alien emotion inside me.Iruefully admitted the night wouldn’t have been a success (or safe) had he not tagged along, although, at times, he was the bane of my existence with the slivers of jealousy he displayed.Itwas apparentAxelhad some form of antisocial personality, and like many with the affliction, he had started to view me as his possession and had claimed a right over me.

Itwould’ve been alarming had there been more of a future between us.Therewasn’t.Witheach item we crossed off,Iwas one step closer to the promiseIhad made toDadi,Jordan, and everyone else in my life.Eachglorious experience tonight was diminished by the impending panic of what was to come after.Itwas strange.Webarely knew one another, andAxelwas an emotionless, untouchable man.Butthe thought that there’d be nothing more withAxelonce this list was completed left my insides with an unfathomable void.

Insteadof dwelling on the inevitable,Ifocused on the night.Axeldidn’t knowMilanwas my brother and mentioned in passing that the groom from tonight’s wedding had organized fireworks at the end of the afterparty.Milan’sbougie move didn’t surprise me, andIaskedAxelif we could return toChateauat theHempstead.AlthoughIhad no plans of returning to the house until after the bride and groom retired for the night,Iloved fireworks and didn’t see the folly in enjoying them from afar.

Luckily, we had a cozy setup.Thestaff at the venue had constructed a bonfire on the private beach for the guests to enjoy, though no one had ventured here since it was a walk away.Thebonfire was supposed to be put out following the fireworks.However, whenIenthusiastically draggedAxelto the beach, he texted the owners, offering to put the fire out soIcould bask in it for longer.

Axelhad his moments, didn’t he?

Hereemerged from the main building with two beers in one hand and his laptop in the other.Twoblankets were flung over his shoulders, and a portable keyboard was carefully tucked under his arm.Hegracefully maneuvered the items and set them down one by one.Ifit were me,Iwould have fallen face down by now.

“Thanks,”Isaid as he passed me a beer and took the seat next to me.Iwrapped one of the blankets around myself, staring inquisitively at the portable keyboard he placed next to me.

“Sometimescouples want live music for their ceremony instead of aDJ,” he explained. “TheChateauhas a portable keyboard, a harp, and a whole closetful of items for that purpose.”

“Alongwith blankets and booze.”Iraised my beer to clink with his.

Henodded. “Perksof the job.”

Ismiled, grasping he’d snagged the keyboard soIcould write araunchysong,another item on my list.Leaningmy palm against my cheek and wrapping my other hand around my elbow,Istared at the stranger.Despiteour differing backgrounds, we were bewilderingly compatible.

Iwas an adrenaline junkie.Hehad no inhibitions.

Iloved creating music.Heloved mixing it.

Iloved speaking my mind.Heloved provoking me to bare my soul.

Socialstanding-wise, religious-wise, and racially, we had nothing in common… except for one another.Thecomfortability between us was oneIhadn’t shared before, and the impending loss of it was overwhelming.

“Tellme everything about you,”Iasked out of nowhere, rephrasing his question from earlier.

Axel’sbrows shot up.Throughoutthe night, he had pressed me for answers while giving very little of himself.JustlikeSean,Imused.Ihated comparing, but you become jaded after your heart’s been broken so many times.Boyslike him never revealed much about themselves, always keeping you at bay.

“Everything?”Hescoffed predictably. “That’lltake hours.”

“So?”

“So, we’ll never finish your bucket list byMonday.”

“Areyou dying onMonday?”Iasked with a straight face.

“Wasn’tplanning on it.”

“ThenIsuppose we have time.Talk.”

JustwhenIthoughtAxelwould disregard me, he stunned me by telling me his life story.

---