Page 63 of The Gods Only Know

“A trait of the family, I’m afraid,” Sophie said, smiling easily. “Daphne fits right in.”

My mother gave a tight-lipped smile in return.

“So, Dad,” I said, still holding on to Lukas’s hand. “How are your classes this year?”

My father perked up and took off into an intricate story.Hewas allowed to speak of his research and instruction without judgment.

I relaxed back into my chair, though my posture never faltered, with each turn of conversation that drifted further away from me. At some point, I’d released Lukas’s hand to pick up my fork. He’d done the same. But our hands returned to each other every time.

I told myself it's because they were on the table, so we had to. It didn't make any sense. Everyone at this table knew we were together, but I cared more about his hand in mine than logic. I didn’t know what he was telling himself.

Dinner didn’t last long. I felt a little pang of guilt at the relief I felt when our plates emptied in record time.

“It was lovely seeing you both,” Sophie addressed my parents. “But I am going to turn in for the night.”

“Of course,” my mother responded gracefully. “We’d better get going ourselves. Daphne, would you mind?”

I nodded. Sophie hugged me quickly then excused herself.

Lukas didn’t move. I had to place a hand on his arm to get his attention. “I’m going to say goodbye.”

His chin ducked down in one sharp motion. His gaze slid to my parents for a beat, then he turned on his heel and left the room.

“What is it?” I asked. It was always something. My hair, the volume of my voice, anything.

My mother came around the table, resting her adorned hands on my shoulders. “We just wanted to make sure you’re okay.”

My eyebrows pinched together. “Um, yes. I’m well. Why?”

“We just worry about you is all,” my mother said, gesturing back to my father. “We want to make sure you’re loved.”

My stomach dropped. “I—”

“We know you have your friends. And it seems people at court love you, too. But we still worry.”

I swallowed, pressing the emotion rising in my throat down. “Yes, I’m loved.”

My mother smiled. “Good. We were worried,” she repeated.

I made myself smile, made myself hide the pain. “I’m good. I will see you soon.”

I went through the motions of the goodbye, barely hearing my own voice. I stared at the door they exited from, scared to move. Hot tears were slipping from the corner of my eyes, and I knew that if I gave my body leave, it would convulse in heaving sobs.

They were parents. They meant well, I told myself. Even if the weight of their words were ripping a hole in my chest.

My parents knew me. They’d been the first to point out that there was something about me that wasn’t good enough. And even if I had friends and a court who I’d made love me, Lukas still didn’t.

And the worst part was that they were right. Lukas had told me as much, even if he didn't realize he had.

Chapter 15

Lukas

I’d been injured in countless ways.

Bruises from training. A nasty cut on my arm that took a week to heal. A concussion.

But nothing,nothingfelt more agonizing than listening to Daphne cry through the thin wood door to her bedroom, knowing I had no right to comfort her.

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