Page 61 of El Malo

It’s the opposite, in fact.

For once, I’m deluded about what I should do. I don’t dare speak of these things to my father or my men. I certainly don’t say them to her. I just sit and stew and ponder the fuck out of our future.

We have no future.

“Are you okay?” she asks, genuine concern in her eyes.

No, Rosa, I’m not okay. You’re fucking me over and I’m letting you.

“Perfect, mami.”

She frowns as if she doesn’t believe me but doesn’t say another word on the subject. I pay the tab and stand. She takes my offered hand and I pull her up. With her purse clutched protectively at her side, she wraps her arm around mine and leans her head on my shoulder.

An ache, deep in my chest, won’t stop throbbing as we walk out of the hotel restaurant and out onto the street. I let her guide me past some shops that haven’t been ravaged by crime until she stops in front of an old shop. One of those shops that sells anything and everything. I wonder who she’s meeting here because there’s nothing I could ever want or need from a place like this.

“I’ll be right back.” Her bright smile is disarming. She’s so fucking good. I lean down to accept a kiss on the mouth.

Before she can get too far, I grab her waist and pull her to me. Her eyes are soft and loving as she regards me. “Don’t go,” I utter, my words so quiet you can barely hear them over the busy shoppers chattering as they walk by.

This moment feels pivotal.

I can sense it with every fiber of my being.

“Javier,” she murmurs. “What’s gotten into you? Are you feeling okay?”

I hug her to me and inhale her hair. For a minute, we simply hold one another. Of all my abilities to get this town to yield to my demands, why can’t freezing time be one of them? Long before I’m ready, she pulls away.

“I’ll be right back. I promise. Then, we can go back home and get back in bed,” she says, her cheeks turning slightly pink.

Reaching forward, I clutch her neck in a possessive way before pressing my lips to hers. Her kiss is tentative at first but then she kisses me with so much passion it confuses me. She lies even to herself. One doesn’t kiss like that unless they want to.

Sweet, confused Rosa.

She pulls away and I watch her rush inside the building. I’m left alone on the sidewalk, wishing for more time.

Unfortunately, time has officially run out.

---