Page 63 of El Malo

I jolt at his harsh words. He climbs out of the car and stalks to the clearing. I set my purse down and follow after him. Up here on this cliff, the winds are high and my hair blows all around, whipping me in the face. I follow him to the edge where he stands, looking over, with his hands on his narrow hips. In his pale gray slacks and linen white button-down shirt, he’s handsome as ever.

“What’s wrong?” I ask, my voice getting lost in the wind.

“Thirty meters,” he tells me as he points to the churning ocean at the bottom of the cliff. “Thirty meters from here to there.”

Panic flitters through me as I peer over the ledge. I grow dizzy at the height and clutch his elbow.

“We’re too close,” I choke out.

He turns toward me and tosses his glasses into the grass. “You’ve been lying to me, Rosa. Admit it.”

I gape at him in shock. “W-What?”

“About everything. You’re not Rosa Delgado, are you?”

Holding up my hands, I start stammering. “L-Listen. I am Rosa.”

He grips my wrists and pulls me to him. His eyes flash with a mixture of fury and heartbreak. My own heart cracks open in the process. “How can you lie straight to my face?” he demands, his voice harsh.

“I. Am. Rosa.”

He blinks in confusion. “I don’t matter to you. You have a hidden agenda.”

Not anymore.

“No,” I rasp out over the wind. “You matter to me. You’re everything to me, Javier.” Tears pool and then spill from my lids.

His brows furl together and he’s so visibly upset, I let out a choked sob on his behalf. The big, brave, fierce El Malo leader is broken. I broke him.

“I don’t understand how you can look me right in the eyes and tell these lies.” His jaw clenches and his Adam’s apple bobs as he swallows down his emotion.

I try to clutch onto his lapels, but his grip on my wrists is too strong. “Javier, please,” I beg. “Please listen to me.” He’s blurry through my tears, but I blurt out the words I’ve wanted to say for a long time. “I love you. I love you so much it hurts. It tears me in half. Right down the middle. I’m so lost and confused but somehow, with you, everything makes perfect sense.”

“Lies,” he roars over the wind, one of his arms wrapping around my waist.

“Not lies!” I shriek. “I’ve loved you from the moment you made me yours.”

He growls and presses his forehead to mine. Fire and fury blazes in his gaze. “If you love me like you claim, would you die for me?”

My heart sinks. I’d rather live.

But without him, my world feels empty. Going back to my life when Javier wasn’t mine and I was just drifting through the motions feels like torture. Every bit as awful as the shed. I didn’t realize what a ghost I’d become. I was hell-bent on seeking vengeance for what happened to my mother that I didn’t care it came at the expense of my happiness.

I was never happy.

The last time I was truly happy was when I skipped my way into that restaurant when I was a young girl. Before my happiness was stolen from me in the blink of an eye. It didn’t return until a couple of months ago when I somehow got dragged right to the center of Javier’s world.

And I am happy.

“I would die for you,” I tell him honestly.

His fierce features fall as he regards me in confusion. He releases my wrist but holds my waist tightly. Gently, he runs his nose along mine and then kisses my lips. “Then we will both die because I can’t live without you, manzanita.”

I don’t understand the violent change in our afternoon, but I know exactly how he feels. I cling to his solid frame, seeking out his comfort.

“If you tell me the truth, you can go. You don’t love me,” he says, bitterness in his tone. “You can walk away. But if you love me like you claim, you’re sentencing us both to death.” He points to the water below that churns wildly. “Millions of big, sharp rocks. Say the words and you may leave. I’m giving you your out.”

I tilt my head up and meet his stare. Then, I stand on my toes and kiss his mouth. “I love you, Javier Estrada, and you can’t talk me out of it.”

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