Page 78 of Last Call at the Local

The door to the pub swings open, and I whirl around, thinking it’s Raine, and I can finally get this over with, but Nina walks through the door with Josie and Jacqueline.

As soon as Jacqueline sees Ollie, she shouts, “Daddy!” and races over to him.

Nina pushes her sunglasses on top of her head. “I gestated thesechildren for nine months, and they both come out looking like him.” She sighs. “Mother nature is cruel.”

Ollie picks up Jacqueline and ruffles her hair. “Maybe we just need to try again.”

“Hilarious, Oliver,” Nina deadpans. “I’m dying of laughter.”

Josie, who stays by Nina’s side, points at the guitar case on the counter. “What’s that?”

“It’s a guitar,” I say.

Nina stares at the guitar case. “Is it...”

“For the love of God, yes, it’s Raine’s guitar. Jesus, how many times am I going to have to say it? If I’d have known I was going to have such a large audience, I would’ve snuck in through the back.”

“How are you going to give it to her?” Nina asks.

“When she comes back from Fota, I’m going to hand her the guitar case.”

Nina looks at me as if she’s never heard of a worse idea in her entire life. “Don’t be ridiculous. This is your chance to make a big romantic gesture!”

“Why would he do that?” Ollie says.

Nina gestures at me. “Because he’s in love, obviously!”

Everyone looks at me. I flip one of the latches on the case up and down but don’t say anything.

“You can’t justhand it to her, Jack,” Nina says.

“Actually, annoying sister-in-law, I can.” I flip the latch down, then pick up the guitar case and step around Ollie to push through the kitchen door and head straight for my office.

Once inside, I set the guitar case on the floor and just stand there staring down at it. The door eases open, but I don’t turn around.

“Jackie,” Ollie says.

“What?” Why won’t everyone just leave me alone?

Ollie sighs, and I turn to find him standing in the doorway withJacqueline still in his arms. She has her head on his shoulder, her thumb stuck in her mouth as she watches me, looking as if she’s fighting off sleep.

“If you really do love her, maybe you ought to talk to her,” Ollie says.

“Thank you for that unasked-for advice,” I say.

“I’m serious, Jackie.” He steps inside and shuts the door behind him.

“What is there to talk about? Her whole life is traveling. My whole life is here, whether I want it to be or not.”

“All I’m saying is that if you want to be with her, you should tell her. It can’t be as black-and-white as that. Let her decide what she wants.” Ollie smooths Jacqueline’s hair, and her eyes slowly drift shut. “And don’t act like I’m the one keeping you here. I told you I’d buy your half of the pub if you wanted.”

I sink into the office chair and stare at the mess of Post-its on the desk. For the last week, Raine and I have been having a conversation through sticky notes that has somehow become a competition to see who can leave the most ridiculous note. It started simply enough. I found a note Raine left that said,Shaggy Angel HitClip? Where?I had no idea what it was about, but I left a another nearby that said,Did you check inside the cat tent?It escalated rather quickly from there, and now the desk is covered in ridiculous brightly colored notes. I notice a new one beside the keyboard.Glowsticks? Yes no maybe?I flick it with a finger and laugh.

There’s silence, except for the sound of Jacqueline sucking her thumb.Just tell her.Easy enough for Ollie to say. Ollie with his happy marriage and his two kids and his comfortable house he doesn’t hate on principle and his normal fucking brain.

As soon as I think it, I worry I’ve wished him ill and all those good things will get taken away from him.

I want to undo it in my mind, but I know I shouldn’t.

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