Page 31 of Captive Bride

It sounds too silly to admit such a thing. Who falls in love at first sight anyway?

“So, what are you gonna do tonight?” she asks me.

“Oh, nothing. I’m just gonna change and take a bath. Theo said he might try to bust me out of here, and if he does, I’ll call you.”

“Sounds good. Just be careful and make sure you call me if you leave. I’m gonna go out with one of those hot guys I met at the party. And I’ll be back later.”

“Okay,” I say.

“Hey, Baby, I’m really happy you had your first kiss. And I’m glad it was with somebody worthwhile.”

I smile at her.

Of course, she’s right. I’ve been dreaming of this moment for as long as I can remember. It does something to take the sting out of marrying the Governor.

But at the same time, I know it’s unlikely that I’ll ever see the mystery guy again. And I do know that my future is cemented and that I’ll be moving to the Governor’s mansion soon.

I try not to think about that, though, because it brings me down, and tonight I am so very up.

I walk around in my lingerie, like I always do. It’s a habit of mine. No one ever sees me in this apartment, so why not do it? I like to look hot for myself.

I’m about to sink into a hot bath and relish the feeling of him, the guy who gave me my first kiss.

Walking around the apartment, lighting all of my expensive candles, all I can think of is him. I play some soft music and prepare to relax.

Then I pull my cashmere blanket around my shoulders to shield me from the cold as I make my way out to the balcony. I need one more breath of fresh air.

It’s still raining. It’s a heavy kind of rain, the kind that I love.

I look out on the city, one that I know so well. I practically have this view memorized.

And for the first time in a long time, I don’t think about jumping.

I know I would never have the guts to do it, but I’ve felt so trapped for so long that the idea of death comes to me every time I stand out here.

It would be so easy to fling myself over the edge and to forget that any of this ever happened.

Part of me wants to do it to make my father suffer. Part of me wants to do it so that my mother will finally understand how unhappy I’ve been.

They don’t love me, though. I doubt they would mourn me for very long.

The people that would mourn for me are Thelma and Theo. And of course, I could never hurt them like that.

Besides, tonight feels different. One kiss from a mystery man, and I feel like there’s hope again. I may never see him after tonight, but I had at least that one special moment.

A moment when I let myself go, when he held me in his arms and kissed me so passionately, I felt like things in the world could be right for once.

And then I ran away. I wonder what would have happened if I had stayed and confronted those deep things he made me feel.

I close my eyes and try to remember the exact lines and features of his strong and rugged face. I remember his full lips and the commanding way he embraced me. I remember feeling like I could trust him, that he would never hurt me.

Even though he exhibited a sense of power, I didn’t feel frightened of him like I do with the Governor. No, this guy made me feel like I could be safe for once without the aid of bodyguards. I feel like I could let go in his arms, and he would always, always catch me.

Mushy, right? What is that anyway? Romance? Lust?

I go inside and get ready to slip into the hot tub when someone knocks on the door. My heart flutters a little bit, because I think it’s Theo and I’ll be able to get out of here. He must’ve had to pull some serious strings.

I keep the blanket wrapped around my shoulders as I go to answer the door.

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