Page 41 of A Nine-Month Deal With Her Husband

She’d rather lie down in a bed of fire ants. And they only had a half-hour before the concert was about to start. ‘I don’t want to spend the little time I have left with you watching a concert. Will our absence be noticed?’ she asked as he steered her away from Bettina’s group. Ben was leaving directly after the concert and she...

Did not.

Want him.

To go.

‘Since we are seated in the front row, in the middle, with trustees on either side of us, I’d say yes,’ Ben told her, his smile warm but frustrated.

‘Damn.’ She slipped her hand into his and rested her head against his shoulder as he steered her down a few steps into a quieter area empty of guests. ‘I could do with a drink.’

He walked over to a waiter in the distance and returned with two glasses of champagne, then led Millie through a series of doors before finding a small, empty room and pulling her inside.

Ben lowered his head to kiss her and Millie sighed when his lips hit hers. She waited to be swept away, to fall into the magic of their kiss, but an annoying imp shouted questions from her shoulder.

Did he kiss her—Margrét—like this? How much did he love her? Did he still think about her?

She pulled back and Ben squinted down at her. ‘What’s the matter?’ he asked.

She needed the answer to one question now—curiosity was burning a hole through her stomach. ‘Why didn’t you tell me you were engaged?’ Millie asked him.

He quietly cursed and she knew he didn’t want to answer her question. Doubts, hot and sour, rolled over her. It was all very well saying that they should talk, to find a way forward, but was she setting herself up for disappointment? If Ben couldn’t talk to her about his ex, someone she presumed he was over, then what hope was there for him opening up about everything else?

Fear invaded her body. What was she doing? She was risking her heart, risking getting hurt...

Ben frowned. ‘I didn’t think it was relevant and it was a long time ago.’ He touched the frown lines between her eyebrows. ‘Why are we talking about this now?’

Because she needed some reassurance to get her through the next few days apart? ‘I hate that you don’t talk to me, Ben. And I don’t feel as though you were honest with me.’

‘I never lied to you,’ he countered.

‘I asked you if you’d ever been in love,’ she shot back. ‘It was a perfect time to tell me you’d been engaged, to explain what happened. You loving someone else isn’t a big deal, you not telling me you were engagedis.’

‘I’m not good at expressing myself, Mils,’ he replied, sounding frustrated. She didn’t blame him—he’d come in here to spend some time loving her, wanting to give her a send-off that’d carry them through the next few days, but she was throwing up barriers between them.

‘I know, but I wish you would try,’ Millie said, sounding a little desperate. ‘I’ve lived with half-truths and I hate feeling as though I’m standing on shifting sand. I need to know everything, the good, bad and ugly.’

Oh, stop, Millie. Just let it go.

But she couldn’t. The floodgates were open and she couldn’t hold back the tide.

Ben lifted his arm and rested it against the wall above her head. Millie looked up into his masculine face.

Her breath caught at the emotion in his eyes—there was something there she’d never seen before. Something softer, kinder, but also bolder and braver. ‘Are you sure you want the truth, Mils?’

‘Always,’ she assured him, her heart speeding up at the tenderness in his eyes. Was he about to...? Could she hope that he...?

Ben rested his forehead against hers. It took him a few minutes to speak. ‘There are so many things I want to s-say, Millie, b-but we have so...so little time,’ he said, his voice deeper than usual. ‘I...I...th-think... Ca-ca-ca-crap!’

He hauled in a deep breath, closed his eyes and Millie’s eyebrows raised. He looked as though he was in physical pain. What was going on with him?

‘La-la-look,’ Ben spat the last word out with the speed of a bullet. His F-bomb came out far more fluently than any of his words before.

‘Are you okay?’

‘Of ca-ca-course I...I’m bl-bl-bloody okay!’

She’d never seen him like this, abruptly distressed and flustered and upset. She was so used to Ben being controlled and urbane and she didn’t recognise the wild look in his eyes and didn’t know the reason for the heat in his cheeks. ‘Seriously, Ben, what’s wrong?’ she asked, gripping his arm. ‘Should I call someone?’

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