Page 3 of Kindness

Staring at the bowl in front of me as everyone else eats.

“You’re not eating anything, darling,” Dad says, watching me. I look at him, momentarily confused; he gestures to the bowl before me.

“You’re going to need your strength, especially when planning a wedding, dear,” Sheila says, her tone almost convincingly motherly. Picking up the spoon

I start eating, but with every mouthful, I feel the nausea swirling again; I do my best to stamp it down, but eventually, I have to excuse myself.

“Excuse me, I need to use the restroom,” I say, standing from my seat. Aiden stands at the same time.

“It’s okay. You sit and enjoy your meal; I won’t be a moment,” I state, trying to get as far away from him as fast as possible.

“I need to use the ladies’ room too,” Sheila says as she removes her napkin from her lap and stands; she follows behind me up the stairs to the bathroom on the first floor; as my hand reaches for the doorknob, Sheila grabs my arm.

“Listen here, young lady, I will not allow this marriage to happen, do you hear me? You will not be marrying my precious boy; he deserves more than a spoiled princess as his bride,” she spits as she digs her nails into my arm; at least we both agree on something. I pull my arm from her grip, not saying a word.

Storming into the bathroom. “How fucking dare he do this to me,” I whisper to myself as I lean over the toilet, trying hard not to vomit. After a few minutes, the nausea passes, and I slowly stand, wash my hands, and exit the bathroom. I expect to see Sheila waiting outside for me, but I come face to face with Dax instead.

“I’m sorry, Tamara. So fucking sorry,” he whispers as he tries to embrace me; I push him away; Dax has been my protector since we were kids. he was my best friend at school and one of the only people that I knew I could talk to; his father William was dads second in command right up until the day he was shot by another family. With his second out of commission, Dax should have been chosen, but he was too young, and that’s why Danial is now second in command; as soon as Dax turned eighteen, his mum made him agree to be dad's third.

“You’re sorry,” I say as I step back into the still-open bathroom door, “you knew this was going to happen, and yet you still chose to keep it from me.” I keep my voice low so no one can hear us, “Do me a favour and stay the fuck away from me,” slamming the door in his face, I take a moment to calm my breathing; I give my face a quick wipe, getting rid of any evidence of tears and then I stand tall and exit the bathroom.

“We thought you had got lost, my dear,” Sheila says with fake concern as I re-enter the dining room, take my seat and begin eating the salmon that has now replaced the soup.

“Sorry, I wasn’t feeling well,” I murmur as I force myself to eat. The rest of the meal goes by in a blur as I tune out the conversations around me. No one seems bothered by the fact that Dad has just announced my engagement, and I can only assume that’s why Mum isn’t here because Dad knows that she would have fought him on his decision.

Chapter 2

Tamara

“Iwasthinkingwecould get married in September,” Aiden's voice pulls me from my thoughts. I don’t answer him straight away; instead, I’m confused because he genuinely seems like he wants to marry me; he’s not as shocked by the whole ordeal as I am. If I were a betting woman, I’d say that he knew why he was asked to be here tonight, or the other option is that he worked with our fathers to make this engagement happen.

“You should set a date soon, my darling boy. That way, we can look at different venues, isn’t Tamara right?” Sheila asks; she gives me a pointed look that says I better answer her son. I nod in agreement; this seems enough to appease Aiden because he goes back to eating his food.

After dinner ad, Dean Barra and the rest of the men excuse themselves and disappear behind my dad’s office door to no doubt discuss the wedding plans or some other bullshit. I’m left with Sheila and Daniel’s bimbo as the waitstaff begins clearing the table.

“Are you excited, Tamara?” Daniel’s bimbo asks; her voice is worse than nails down a chalkboard; it sends a shiver of disgust down my spine.

“Ummmm,” I mumble because honestly. I have no idea how even to answer that question. Could this stupid bint not see how surprised and furious I was by the whole thing? Some people make me wonder what exactly goes on in their heads during moments like this. “Excuse me, I’m not feeling too great,” I mutter. Standing, I walk out of the dining room.

Footsteps behind me halt my movement as I reach the staircase; I look behind me, spotting Dax leaving the dining room. Initially, I think he will try to follow me, but instead, he heads along the hallway to my father’s office.

“Congratulations,” Dexter sneers as he exits the kitchen to the left of the staircase. I give him the finger and head to my room, closing and locking the door behind me. I wouldn’t put it past Dax to try and get me to talk to him; he knows I’m still mad at him for keeping this fucking bomb from me. Stripping out of the dress, I leave it in a crumpled heap on the floor, grabbing some shorts and a t-shirt from my drawer before flopping down onto my bed.

“How the fuck do I get out of this mess?” I ask myself, there has to be something. Maybe I can ask Sheila to get Aiden to change his mind, or perhaps she will try that all on her own because she didn’t seem like she wanted any of this to happen, I don’t understand any of it; I know my father wants more territory in Beastville, but to force a marriage doesn’t make any sense to me. He knows that the other families won’t allow it, especially not the Hernandez Cartel, because they already own Royal Cross, so this match with Aiden makes no sense; there has to be more at stake for my father to do something this drastic.

I’m so confused because, as far as I know, Aiden’s family doesn’t own any property or land in Beastville. What the fuck has got into Dax? Knocking at my door pulls me from my inner thoughts.

“Tamara, darling, are you in there?” Mum’s soft voice calls from outside my door; I haul myself up off my bed, opening the door, and mums tear-stained face comes into view.

“You know?” It’s not a question because I can tell by the tears and the fact that she pulls me into her arms for a hug. I’m not angry at her because I know that if she had tried to tell me, then it would have only resulted in a severe beating from Dad.

“I’m so sorry, sweet girl; I tried to get your father to change his mind. That’s what set him off tonight; I begged him to reconsider after I overheard him on the phone earlier today discussing the whole thing with Dean Barra,” my mum breaks down even more, pulling her into my room and making her sit down on my seat at my vanity table. So she did try to get him to change his mind. I’m grateful, but at the same time, I’m also surprised because, looking over Mum now, I don’t see any bruises to indicate Dad’s rage.

“It’s okay, Mum, this isn’t your fault. It’s his. Why does he hate me so much?” I ask as my eyes fill with tears. I try to swipe them away, but they fall instead. My whole body shakes as I sob my heart out. Wiping my hands down my face and clearing away the tears, I stand up, determined to find a way out of this mess. Mum watches as I start pacing the room.

“Whatever you’re thinking, Tamara, please be careful, baby girl; I can’t lose you,” Mum cautions me as she stands and grabs my shoulders, halting my steps. She stares into my eyes; Mum always had this look that I could see deep into my soul whenever I was planning something as a child. “I know you, and I know you don’t want to do this, but please just be careful,” she says as she kisses my cheek and leaves the room.

Grabbing my diary from its space on my bookcase, I write down everything that has happened today. I always write in my diary, especially when significant events are happening in my life; I find that it helps calm me and lets me think more clearly. There’s only one way out of this, and that’s for me to disappear, but for that to happen, I will need to talk to Dax since he knows a guy that can make it happen.

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