Page 2 of Hurt for Me

When you want something bad enough, you need to pay the consequence.

There, on her lower cheek, like a constellation of freckles, was dried blood.

CHAPTER 2

RAE

2024

Rae loved the smell of sweat first thing in the morning. It was better than fresh-brewed coffee, better than bacon frying in a well-seasoned iron skillet. It lit up all her senses like nothing else in the world.

There was something electric and primal about the smell of sweat, reminding her of an approaching coastal storm, of warm, gritty sand pushing up between her toes, salty wind whipping through her hair. It reminded her of endless, terrifying possibilities. She tried not to think about it so she wouldn’t start shaking.

She had to focus on the sweaty, half-naked man in front of her.

Thomas Highsmith. He looked powerless kneeling on the floor at Rae’s feet, which was exactly how she wanted him to feel. It’s what he paid her a lot of money to do. During the day, Thomas was an executive accountant for one of the big oil and gas companies, the kind that supposedly kept Oklahoma City at the forefront of growth and opportunity even as the prisons filled with people convicted of minor drug offenses and public schools crumbled and closed from lack of funding.

Rae thought of the insane amount she’d spent on school supplies throughout the year for Lily’s high school education, and she thought about giving Thomas a good kick in the ass with her black thigh-high patent leather boot.

As if he could read her mind, he looked her in the eyes for a brief second before staring back down at his hands clasped on his lap.

“We’re done. Get up.”

Thomas already knew they were finished because she had ended the session with the crop, as he had wanted, yet he didn’t move, which sent a flicker of alarm up Rae’s spine. She kept her face calm, indifferent, but she was worried about him. Not about what he might do to her. She trusted him as much as she trusted any of her clients. Without mutual trust, she wouldn’t have a business. No, this worry was different. Thomas had been increasingly distracted over their last sessions, like something was preventing him from relaxing into the pain and allowing her to help him break through his mental barriers.

She swatted Thomas’s back lightly—a gentle warning—with her leather crop. He finally moved a little, slowly, until he was standing. She allowed herself a moment to appreciate the red marks she’d made with the cane and crop across the fair skin of his backside and upper thighs. No matter how many clients she had or sessions she’d done over the years, seeing the marks of her handiwork always stirred pleasurable warmth between her thighs.

Thomas was standing there like a lost child waiting for his mama to tell him what to do, which wasn’t like him. Rae held back a sigh. She had less than thirty minutes to prepare for her next client, but she knew she needed to address whatever it was that was bothering him.

She hadn’t done much damage to warrant extended aftercare, and Thomas wasn’t much for coddling anyway. She got a bottle of sparkling water, something she offered to all her clients, from the room’s minifridge.

“Go ahead and get dressed.”

She avoided watching Thomas tugging on his clothing, mainly because she didn’t need a client getting the wrong idea, but it was hard not to look. He wasn’t like her typical clients, who were mostly older, richer, and a lot less attractive. Thomas was thirty-three, a couple of years younger than her, and he was exactly her type—tall with dark, unruly hair and soft brown eyes that made him appear innocent when she knew he was anything but. She mentally slapped herself and refocused on finding out what was going on with him.

He pulled on his blue button-up, and Rae handed him the bottled water. He looked around at the large space, his eyes traveling across the room to the royal-purple accent wall and the black wooden X of the Saint Andrew’s cross, which he had been tied to minutes before. He stared down at the bottle in his hand, and Rae knew the apprehension on his face wasn’t from anything she had inflicted upon him over the last hour. Or maybe she had been a bit rougher with him and hadn’t realized it. It’d been a difficult morning with Lily dragging ass, almost making Rae late opening the shop.

“We can remove the crop from our sessions if it’s too much,” she said as a way to open the conversation.

Whatever was bothering Thomas, he seemed to shake it off as he set the unopened water on the spank bench next to them and zipped up his slacks.

“No, it wasn’t too much, Mistress V.” He smiled a little. “I’ve just got an important meeting tonight at the Skirvin and—” His face dropped. “Never mind. You don’t want to hear about this boring stuff.”

Rae gave him no indication she cared either way, although she was used to hearing all about boring stuff. Some of her clients, especially the older guys, seemed to forget they paid her to beat them, not drone on for hours about their business dealings.

Thomas stopped buttoning his shirt when he caught Rae staring at his well-toned chest. She quickly shifted her eyes up to his face.

She played it off well and placed her hand on his shoulder, felt his muscles twitch from her touch. “Thomas, I’ve been sensing some ... resistance during our last few sessions. I want to help you reach your goals, but that can only happen if we’re both honest with each other.” She knew he wanted to reach subspace, the blissful state of mind most masochists hope to achieve. “If we’re going too fast or doing too much, I need you to let me know.”

Thomas appeared surprised. “You could never do too much to me, Mistress.”

Rae removed her hand from him. “In that case, we can increase the intensity, maybe add more whipping or perhaps foot torture with a misery stick. That way you can feel it all day at work as you walk around.” She smiled at him, ready to see a gleam in his eye at her suggestion, but he only shrugged a little.

“Mistress,” he said as if something just occurred to him, “I know I’m not supposed to ask this, but would you like to get a drink sometime?”

His question came out of nowhere, but she didn’t allow it to throw her off.

She caught him staring at her breasts pushing up from her tight black corset, and the sudden confidence on his face made her feel ill.

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