Page 48 of The Cabin

‘I want you to come all over my fingers and then you’re going to come all over my cock. Do you understand, little lamb?’ I am struck dumb, I can barely think, barely form sentences around the way his fingers are working me. My core clenches around his fingers when he takes my nipple into his mouth and bites.

‘Are you going to come on these fingers?’ he asks again. I’m not sure. I can tell something is going to happen. My whole body is alight. Responding to his touch. I’ve never been touched like this. He adds a second finger, stretching me, all while continuing his circles. I cannot stop the whimpers from breaking free from somewhere deep inside my chest. I throw my arms around his neck, fingers digging into his green skin.

He removes one of my arms and pulls it under the water, wrapping my hand around his length. I try to pull away, unsure and insecure. I don’t know how to participate in this. I don’t know how to make him feel the way he’s making me feel. And I can hardly focus on anything besides the building in my belly. But he keeps his hand over mine, slowly moving it up and down.

‘Do you feel what you do to me? How hard you make my cock?’ I nod, noting something warm and protruding at the base of it. His fingers curl inside me and my eyes roll to the back of my head.

‘Now tell me you’re going to come on my fingers,’ he growls, pinching my nipples and increasing his tempo. I feel panicked. I don’t know what’s happening to my body but it’s making my legs shake and I can’t help but cry out.

He pinches the sensitive spot he’s been paying so much attention to and I see stars.

‘Say it, woman.’ He nips at my collar bone.

‘I’m going to come on your fingers!’ It's a wild admission. Loud and improper, but I can’t help it. His length twitches in my hand. The movement causing me to clench around his fingers again.

What would it feel like to have this inside me instead of his talented hands?

‘Good fucking woman, come for me.’ His fingers curl once more, and he tweaks his thumb just right and everything explodes. Pleasure wreaks havoc on my body and I cry out his name again and again. I turn to liquid in his arms and when I meet his gaze, I am enraptured by the way he is looking at me.

‘That, little lamb, is what my orc queen will feel every day for the rest of her life.’ He holds my chin as he says it, eyes roaming my face and my naked body like I am everything he has been looking for.’”

I look up from the book, a little lost in the moment. I got caught up in the scene more than I had initially intended. My breathing is shallow, and I can tell my body has responded by the moisture that has soaked through my underwear. I am supposed to be a fearless warrior in this battle of wills. Looks like I girl bossed a little too hard. Is that a millennial thing to say? Whatever.

When I catch Grayson’s eye, suddenly very aware of what I just did and a little unsure of myself, my heart skips a beat. Heat, fire, lust. It’s all there. I’ve seen it on his face before. This is Sultry Grayson. I’ve only caught glimpses of this Grayson and I’m hypnotized every time I do.

We stare for a few more moments before he stands abruptly, ever so sneakily adjusting the front of his jeans. My eyes narrow. Oh, I totally got him. I totally got myself, too, but it’s way easier for me to hide theheatbetween my thighs than it is for him to hide his...length.

My loud, raucous, victorious bark bounces off the trees. Is that what does it foryouGrayson? Alpha males who command their women?

I am just about to start making fun of him and claim my win when he starts firing his attitude. “Get in the house.” Speaking of commands.

“What?”

“Get in the house.” He’s rigid from head to toe, his eyes boring into me.

“Why?”

“It’s going to rain,” he snarls, stomping up to where I’m sitting and grabbing my chair. He all but flings me out of it.

“Grayson, what the hell!” I look up at the very bright, very cloudless sky.

“Sol. Get in the fucking house.” Before I can even really protest, he disappears around the side of said house and within seconds I hear the freaking saw turn back on.

“I hope you get freaking electrocuted in the ‘rain!’ ” I call, flipping my chair over in annoyance.

—

Sometime later I am spread out in the middle of the living room doing a puzzle (starting with the middle, of course). I’m not sure I’ve done a puzzle in twenty years, but here I am, and when I’ve finally taken a break to look at a clock, I’m surprised to see three hours have gone by.

At least I was able to get lost in something. For several reasons. First, the sawing went on for, like, a really long time after I’d started ignoring Grumpy Grayson. And secondly, I’m trying to pretend I’m not affected by Sultry, Commanding,orGrumpy Grayson.

I’m actually starting to have a lot of fun testing out all these new hobbies to help relax and spend time with my thoughts. Well, I have fun in between bouts of Annoying Grayson.

They’re silly, meaningless activities in the grand scheme of things, but I’m finding I don’t mind my own company like I used to. I can sit with my thoughts and not want to self-medicate. I spiral a lot less than I used to. (I’m still the queen of spiraling, don’t worry. I’m nothing if not consistent.) But, I am noticing the shift. Getting away from my apartment, having space from work, having absolutely zero responsibilities. I’m kind of shocked that this mission of mine to come up to the cabin and change my life is sort of working. These are not world-saving hobbies, but they are providing me with clarity I didn’t have before.

And as much as I complain about the never-ending personalities of Grayson I experience daily, I actually think it’s good for me. I cannot explain to you how numb I was for two whole years. Four years, maybe. Eight?

I’d been playing with this idea in my mind since the week and a half I spent alone after the bar. Yes, it’s frustrating, and yes, it’s expediting my going gray, but it’s also exciting and confusing and new and entertaining. I thought this relationship was too dramatic. And my god, Grayson is freaking dramatic. But, it’s shaken me out of my stupor. It’s connected me back to my emotions. Happy, all the way to infuriated. I am happy. I’mhappier. I am also fucked. I am very, very fucked with the amount of attraction I feel towards my roommate who has been very clear about acting out of obligation of his moral code because without him I’d be stranded, dirty, and starving, and who is also still married.

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