“Anyway,” I say in my best attempt at a casual tone, looking down at her. “I just finished with my appointments for the morning and wondered if you wanted to grab lunch.”
“Oh.” Her eyes widen a little, genuine surprise covering her face. “Oh! Well...” Her eyes flick to Liam for a moment before finding mine again apologetically. “I just thought you said that you’d... you know. That you’d be busy most of the day. So I told Parker I’d grab lunch with him.”
“Oh.” I nod more emphatically than necessary. “Of course. I probably should have texted first.”
“No, it’s fine!” She reaches to touch my arm, and even this gentle press of her fingers through my sleeve seems to ease the odd feeling inside. “You can totally come with us. If you want?”
“No, no,” I insist. “That’s okay. Honestly, now that I think about it, I need to sign off on some charts, anyway. I should probably get a jump on that. I’ll just... see you later.”
“Okay,” she says, still touching my arm. “I’ll see you at home?”
It’s a lie, and I know that, so why does it make me feel better that she’s said it?
I think it takes her by surprise, when I close the distance between us, and the closeness pulls her even further from Liam as I lean to pull her mouth to mine. I know it sure as hell takesmeby surprise, given that I don’t think I even made a conscious decision to kiss her. It just sort of happens.
It’s quick, almost chaste, even, but still I linger a second longerthan I need to, reveling in the tiny victory that is Mackenzie immediately yielding to my kiss. I hear Liam make an awkward sound under his breath beside us, and something in me half purrs with contentment at having made it fully known that Mackenzie is entirely off-limits.
Even in my head that sounds insane.
I pull away from her, doing my best to look like I’m not a mess of conflict and uncertainty, echoing:See you at homeagainst her mouth before I step away from her and make for the opposite end of the hall. There’s nothing appropriate about what just occurred, and I know if I allow myself to dissect all that I just did, I will be even more concerned than I already am.
I don’t slow my pace until I’m safely back on my own floor and locked inside my office—sinking into my desk chair and sighing as I ponder the mess that the morning has been. Maybe I’m coming unraveled.
My phone vibrates in my pocket about the time I’m considering banging my head on the desk, and I fish it out quickly to notice Mackenzie’s name flashing across the screen.
MACKENZIE:Did something happen? You seemed kind of weird.
If she only knew the half of it.
ME:Just some shit with Dennis. Figured it would be good to be seen together.
MACKENZIE:Oh. Good call. Nice touch with the kiss. I think you gave Liam a heartattack. Everyone on my floor is pretty sure you’re a serial killer in your spare time.
I take a few seconds more than I need to as I contemplate how to answer that, chewing on the inside of my lip as I try to reason out myself why in the hell I kissed her. I heave out a sigh as I resignedly tap out a lie.
ME:Just playing the part.
I drop my phone on the desk without waiting for her reply, finally giving in to that urge to let my head hit the wood as I groan into it. Of all the tumultuous emotions I have experienced today, none of them can compare to the frightening realization that I might be in over my head here.
I really don’t think it’s a good idea,I’d told her.It could make things very complicated,I’d said. And I’d meant it, at the time. I truly had.
I just never imagined that it might potentially bememaking things complicated.
11
Mackenzie
“So, you werejust... stuck?”
Parker’s expression is equal parts horrified and intrigued—his brow furrowed in thought as he leans across the table in the hospital cafeteria.
“Basically,” I confirm. “Honestly, I assumed that part had been mostly exaggerated in the biology textbooks, but it’s pretty much exactly how it sounds.”
Parker’s face screws up like I’ve just told him that I spontaneously lay eggs. “And what the hell did you do during that time? Play checkers?”
“No.” I laugh. “We just went to sleep afterward. I’ll say this for Noah, he really knows how to wear a girl out.”
“How could you possibly go to sleep like that?”