Page 17 of Intertwined Hearts

“Try me.” The nurse walked over and put the blood pressure cuff on my arm, then began taking the reading.

“Two weeks.”

“Two weeks? That’s it? And he told you he loved you already?”

“Yeah. I love him too.” My gaze drifted off as she swiped my forehead to take my temperature.

“He loves you, you love him. I’m not sure I understand how that adds up to him not being your boyfriend anymore.”

“It just wouldn’t work.”

“You haven’t given it a chance yet. Does this have anything to do with the reason you’re in here right now?”

I could feel the tears prickling my eyes. I didn’t want to cry any more. I sniffed. “Yeah, it does.”

“What that guy did to you wasn’t your fault. No matter what he said to you, you didn’t deserve any of that.”

“He was getting revenge for what happened eight years ago when I helped send him to jail.”

“Very rarely are people put in jail if they don’t deserve it. Did he deserve it when he was convicted and sentenced?”

“Yeah, he did.”

“Then how is that your fault?” She wrote some notes in my chart. “I think you should talk to one of the doctors here. I’m not sure what all happened, but I think it could help you take control of your life again.”

“Thanks.”

She left the room, and I turned on the television. I’d consider talking with someone, but I wasn’t convinced it would do any good.

Chapter 14

Jackie

I was fuming when the doctor left. He was going to keep me another night. He said just to make sure I was stable. But he also said he was recommending I speak with some psychologist. I didn’t want them pressuring me to talk to anyone about any of this. They had no idea the shit storm I had been through. I wasn’t ready to tell them, or anyone, about it.

The appointment came and went, and I was a no-show. Before I knew it, I had that damn doctor in my room. I guess if I wasn’t going to go to him, he was going to come to me. He introduced himself and pulled up a chair.

“Sometimes, when you talk about this stuff, Jackie, it does help,” Dr. Reierson said.

“Yeah, I’ve heard that.”

“I understand your reluctance to rehash everything, but maybe we can just talk about the night in your apartment. Can we do that?”

“Yeah, sure.”

“Did your ex-boyfriend rape you?”

“He violated me.”

“How did he do that?”

“He used his fingers on me, and he forced himself into me. Being in my home was a bad enough violation, but then he did that.” My voice cracked as I talked. “I wish I’d never opened the door.”

“You had no way of knowing he was on the other side of the door when you opened it.”

“I should have looked. I didn’t even check. It was my fault he was able to get to me.”

“Jackie, there’s no excuse for his behavior. He had no right to come to your home, no right to put his hands on you, and no right to threaten you. You did nothing wrong. He was the one who did everything wrong.”