Page 58 of Claiming His Baby At The Altar

‘No.’ Needing to douse the rising panic, Flora folded her shaking arms tightly over her chest, protecting her thumping heart from flying out of her ribs. ‘I’ll move when you’ve listened to what I have to say.’

His tone was contemptuous. ‘There is nothing you have to say that I want to hear.’

‘I don’t care if you want to hear it, I’m going to say it and then you can go on your merry way and leave me to pick up the wreckage, just as you did last time.’

That made him look at her.

‘You cut me out so effectively I had to show you I was pregnant with your child in a public forum. I went through the whole pregnancy alone. That was a wreckage of your making, and I had no one. I couldn’t turn to my brother for help because he was fighting for his liberty.’

‘A consequence of his own actions,’ he corrected harshly.

‘He was your best friend. You knew his theft was completely out of character. You knew how much Mum’s death had screwed with his head—’

‘I told you before, do not use your mother’s death as an excuse for him.’

‘Why not when you use your mother’s death as an excuse for your own despicable behaviour?’

The look on his face could have turned lava to ice. ‘How dare you?’

Flora was in no mood to be intimidated. This day had been a roller coaster of emotions, a fitting end, she thought bitterly, for a marriage that had started life on its own emotional roller coaster of a day. ‘You threw away thirteen years of friendship over one mistake. Justin abused your trust but he hurt you too, but you can’t bring yourself to admit that, can you, not the great Alejandro Ramos who’s unable to be hurt and isn’t afraid of anything? Instead of admitting that he hurt you, you packed more ice around your heart and sought vengeance, and now you’re doing the same thing to me, and not for the first time—you read my brother’s message and assumed what it meant, and now you’re preparing to cut me out again.’

Alejandro was breathing heavily through his nose, his jaw clenched, his gaze unseeing.

‘You blackmailed me into this marriage. Or do you forget that? You forced it on me, but despite it all, I tried, for Benjamin’s sake, and because you showed the most wonderful side to yourself when he was born...’ She gritted her teeth and took a deep breath. ‘I knew the danger you posed to my heart and protecting it against you is a battle I’ve fought every single day of our marriage. It’s a battle I’ve fought for years.’

She thought she caught a flicker in his distant, unseeing gaze.

Dropping her voice, she said, ‘That weekend when you came back to Oxford early because your dad had gone off to Martinique... I saw you naked. Just a glimpse through the gap in my bedroom door. I was thirteen years old.’

His eyes suddenly regained their focus and widened in shock.

‘You woke something in me,’ she confessed, ‘and I haven’t looked at another man since. I have spent over ten years insanely jealous of the women in your life and comparing myself to them. The only reason I gave you my blessing to have affairs was because of my stupid pride—I wasterrifiedyou’d see how deeply my feelings for you ran. I’ve been running from them foryears. All I have ever known is men who cheat and lie and discard women when the next pretty thing comes along... You knocked my barriers down, but I got too close, didn’t I? That’s what this is all about, isn’t it? I got close enough to hurt you.’

His throat moved and he shook his head. For a short moment she thought he was going to say something but then the moment was gone.

Flora filled her lungs with air and her heart with resolve. ‘Itisthe truth. You’re not incapable of being hurt like you pretend to yourself. You’re scared of it. You have the most wonderful side to you, Alejandro. You’re fun and considerate and affectionate and incredibly loving, but the second someone hurts you, you shut down. You twist the pain of their hurt into anger and strike back.

‘You lost the most precious person in your life far too young but pain and hurt are facts of life. Grief is too. There were days I thought the pain of losing my mum would kill me. That pain was the price I paid for loving her, but I wouldn’t trade a single day of her life to have erased that pain. You were a child when you went through that grief and I get why you shut down emotionally from it, but you’re an adult now, with a child of your own. What are you going to do when Benjamin hurts you? Because one day he will. Are you going to turn that pain into anger and strike back at him? Will you shut him out of your heart too? Your own flesh and blood?’

The baby monitor suddenly came to life. The sound of their son’s cries cut through the toxic atmosphere swirling around them.

Feeling sick, Flora stepped forwards and placed a hand on Alejandro’s frozen chest.

Staring hard into his eyes, she said, ‘When you’re old and lonely and thinking back on our marriage, remember you were the one who threw us away. Despite all the odds, you did make me happy; very happy. I fell in love with you and I think a part of you fell in love with me too. We could have had something good but you were too scared to take it. You gave me the cruellest ultimatum you could and you made it because you knew I would never turn my back on my brother. Youwantedthis outcome and, in all honesty, I’m glad of it. Anyone who can make an ultimatum like that and try to force someone to give up someone who means so much to them doesn’t deserve love, and you don’t deserve mine. Now, I’m going to see to our son. You can see yourself out.’

And then, she turned around, opened her studio door, and walked away from him.

Benjamin’s bright red cheeks and high-pitched wails told Flora he was teething again. Her battered heart ached for him. Every time she put him down, he started crying again and she ended up settling with him on her bed and letting him fall asleep in her arms. A good hour passed before she remembered to message her brother and tell him he was safe to come home.

A short while later there was a tap on her bedroom door and her brother’s worried face emerged.

She swallowed hard and shook her head.

He closed his eyes briefly before padding over to perch on the side of her bed. ‘I’m sorry,’ he whispered.

A tear fell down her cheek. ‘So am I.’

He kissed the top of her head and left the room, closing the door softly behind him.

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