Page 3 of We End With Us

“I know.” I breathe, my fingers weaving in the strands of her hair, anything to keep myself distracted. Thinking back, I wonder what we could have done differently and how we could have changed the outcome.

“Pup.” Cass expels a large breath, waiting for Nova to respond.

His fingers tangle with hers, and he kisses the side of her temple.

“Please don’t,” she whispers.

“No,” Cass says.

Nova scrunches her eyes shut.

“I don’t deserve your forgiveness,” she whispers softly.

“I'm not letting you blame yourself, Nova. Fuck that. King did what he did; it was his choice.” Cass collars the back of her neck with his hand, tugging her close so he can press a kiss to her temple. Her eyes cast down staring between us, avoiding our gazes.

“Fuck, mamas, we almost lost you too.” Staring up at me, Nova’s eyes drift shut before her gaze finds mine again.

Toying with her other hand, she lets me bring it up to kiss her palm gently before lowering it back between us.

Jordy stands back watching it all from the door. Leaning back against the frame, his large body occupies most of the space.

Needing a moment, I nod toward Nova. Pushing himself up as he walks toward us, I free her body from mine. I let Jordy take my place as I shuffle from the bed, needing a moment to collect myself.

Walking downstairs, each step more hurried than the last, I take a deep breath before my feet hit the ground outside. I spin on my heel and head toward the lake, needing a moment to breathe.

My face creases in pain before I drop to my knees just before the lake, and the pain I’ve been desperately trying to hold in comes tumbling out.

It’s not enough. Standing, I go to a tree and without hesitation slam my fist directly into the bark. Sucking in a breath of pain, I rear back and punch it again.

My knuckles burn and with a quick glance down the feeling of blood is confirmed.

Fuck.

“You good?” Cass’ voice drifts from behind me.

Shaking my hand, I grimace before Cass grips it taking a look.

Sighing, he shakes his head. “Nice way to fuck up your hand.”

“I’m fine,” I snap. Forcing my hand from his.

“Bass.” His voice cracks slightly before his phone rings, forcing whatever he was going to say down.

Walking away, I don't wait for whatever else he has to say. I’m not in the mood to listen to the bullshit I know he’s going to tell me. He can’t change what happened, he can’t stop me from feeling like my entire world has imploded.

My own phone vibrates in my pocket, but I ignore it, knowing it can only be one of two people and I can't deal with them right now.

Slamming the door behind me, Nova stops in front of me.

“Bass?”

Swallowing, I know I need some time right now because with King gone, I don't know how to move on from these feelings and what they mean. Because without him, they’re just gone.

I fold my hands over the top of my head, lacing my fingers together while I take some deep breaths.

I don't want them—her to look at me differently. All my life I denied what I was, what I truly felt. I pivot to face her. Nova watches me with caution, concern filling her eyes. Even right now she’s seeing way too fucking much.

“Bass, are you okay?” Nova’s voice is like a bucket of icy cold water, slowly drowning me.