Page 77 of Unloved

“Sorry,” she signs, and I shake my head. We aren’t in a rush.

When she finishes up, I don’t miss the kiss the stylist plants on Clem’s cheek or how red they turn at the gesture. Pretending I didn’t see anything, I lead Abby to the front of the shop only to be met with Samuel, leaning against his car and looking like a snack I just want to devour.

Jumping into his embrace, my mouth finds his for a quick kiss.

“Where’s Rhys?”

He signs the letter G and rotates his wrist.Gym.

“Are we picking him up?”

At this he grabs his phone and just continues the conversation in text.

Samuel: We’re all meeting at Cali Burgers. Apparently, Arlo and Frankie have news.

I already know what the news is, but I’m excited to see how everyone reacts when Frankie and Arlo share it.

By the time we’re all packed into Cali Burgers, Remy and Abby are in a deep conversation about computer firewalls and Frankie is obsessing over Clem’s new hairstyle.

Samuel wraps his arms around me and his breath ghosts over my ear.I love you.

He follows it up with our favorite sign, but I don’t need it to know when he says it, he’s feeling it.

It’s everywhere and in everything.

It’s as permanent as my pulse, beating every second of every day.

He leans in for another kiss, and when we part, I see Arlo and Rhys walking into the diner together. Still looking apprehensive, it has taken Rhys a moment to not worry about whether anybody judges him over his relapse.

Even though everybody has gone out of their way to ensure he knows he is the priority in our lives, I know accepting what we say is the truth can only happen in his time.

When his eyes land on Samuel and me, his face splits into the smile he only ever reserves for us. He moves to grab a seat but Samuel tugs on his hand and drags him into his lap, ensuring he’s closer to us. Always reminding him, in any way he can,we want you here.

When seated, Rhys buries his head in my neck.I love you.

This time I’m the one who follows it up with the sign, making sure Rhys feels it, making sure he knows that my love for him is unconditional.

That my love for him is everywhere and in everything.

It’s as permanent ashispulse, beating every second of every day.

The three of us love differently. The way we show love and the way we receive it. But it’s the presence of love in its entirety that makes any of this possible at all.

29

SAMUEL

SIX WEEKS LATER

“Happy Birthday.”

My mom’s face fills up the computer screen, her smile contagious.

“Thank you, Samuel honey. It’s so good seeing you. How are you?”

My mom and I talk all the time. We’re close, in a Gen Z type of way. We text. A lot. But phone calls and FaceTimes are saved for special occasions. Like her birthday.

“I’m good, Mom. How are you?”

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