Page 81 of Knot Your Problem

“You have to let me go, Dio,” Sam said, sitting stiffly in Dio’s arms. I knew in my gut he was talking about more than the hug. Sam sounded like he knew he had no chance of staying sane out there alone. He’d closed his eyes and looked half destroyed. It was killing me.Why the hell had I been gone so long? I’d been told I was doing what was best for everybody, but was the cost to us worth it?

“No fucking way. We’re a team,” Dio said, sounding angrier than I’d ever heard him. “We can figure this out. Pala’s right. There’s no way in hell I’m letting either of you go. Never again.” His words sounded firm, but the panic I felt was reflected in his eyes as he looked at me.

Yet, Sam was a grown man and a highly dominant alpha, we couldn’t force him to stay if he’d set his mind to leaving. It would destroy Dio if he left without him, though. I wouldn’t cope much better, not when I’d just glimpsed everything I’d ever wanted.

I realized my friends’ futures were hanging on a knife’s edge right now and I didn’t know what to do. My own fears were holding me back after being gone so long. I’d imagined our reunion for years, and while it hadn’t quite been us all running through a field of flowers toward each other, it hadn’t been this either.

“Nobody is leaving,” Leif said after a moment, cutting into the silence. He looked at Sam and Dio on the ground, then up at me hovering behind them. He seemed just as conflicted.

“Fudgsicles. I’m not the best person to talk you through this. We should get Hunter, or wait for Max,” Leif said, looking a little lost. “Or maybe GG.”

“Talk us through what?” I asked. I was completely confused, but on board with the idea that we needed help.

“Becoming a pack,” Leif said plainly. I just stared at him. I heard an actual cricket call out from the long grass nearby in the sudden silence.

Sam looked up from where he was sitting on the ground with Dio wrapped around him like a spider monkey. It was a pose I’d seen them do a lot when we were teenagers and Sam was freaking out. Sam’s eyes were wide and looked as stunned as I felt, but Dio was suddenly grinning up at Leif as if he’d just been handed his favorite treat. The momentary panic was gone from his eyes.

“Doesn’t a pack need a prime alpha? That’s what you guys said the other morning. Your pack naturally supports Damon as the prime, and it needs to include a beta,” Sam asked with a frown marring his face.

“Holy shit,” I said, probably a little too loud, as so many things finally made sense to me. I’d always heard prime alphas whispered about in my community, but only by the elders and as something from legend.

“What?” Sam asked. He was clenching his fists as though his frustration was growing, and I could feel his dominance rising again with it.

“Is he always this dense?” Leif asked Dio, as he shook his head, making his plaits shift around.

“About himself? Yes, always,” Dio answered. I watched as he bit his lip, trying to keep his smile contained. He knew. He was also up to something, and my guess was Leif had just unwittingly played into his plans.

“WHAT are you talking about?” Sam growled, his gaze swinging between the two of them as he twisted his head to scowl at Dio.

“Calm your tits,” Dio told him affectionately. “You’re clearly a prime alpha.”

Sam sat with his mouth agape, stupefied. He looked at Dio and went to speak, then stopped. He looked over to Leif, started again, and stopped before any words came out. The poor guy looked like his brain had turned into a bowl of warm porridge.

“I think you broke him, Dio,” I said.

Dio just grabbed Sam’s head in a tight hug that looked more like a headlock. “Just breathe, we’ve got this.” It was a testament to how shocked Sam was that he just sat there and didn’t even try to extricate himself.

“Aww, man. You’re no fun when you’re broken,” Dio said to him, as he released Sam’s head and ruffled his hair.

“What does this mean for us?” I asked Leif. I’d always known Sam’s dominance was off the charts, but he so rarely directed it I figured the world had only been getting glimpses of his potential. From the little I knew, prime alphas often became self-destructive unless a pack anchored them.

Had Dio been trying to do that alone while I’d been gone?

“Honestly, we’re just winging it and figuring it all out ourselves,” Leif said, as he chuckled and shrugged ruefully. “Maia has a book about packs that we’ll lend you. It’s ancient and very illegal, but nobody really cares right now.”

He looked at me, then back at Sam and Dio. I could see where his mind was going and I could feel the hit coming like it was a punch aimed right at me.

“We had already formed a pseudo pack long before we met Maia, though, and there were three of us helping to balance out Damon. Even though we didn’t know what we were doing, we figured out early that touch from us calmed him down. Dio’s been doing it on his own for years. I’m amazed Sam isn’t half feral.”

And there it was. I felt like I couldn’t breathe.

Dio looked up at me and must have caught the look on my face. “Don’t, Pala. You left for a good reason. This isn’t on you.”

“Isn’t it though? They told me it was best for everyone, but it felt wrong to leave. I should have listened to my own instincts.” The last few years had been bleak and tough.

Could I have avoided all the darkness if I’d just stayed and trusted in my friends?

“No,” Dio insisted, pulling me out of my thoughts as he got up from Sam and stalked the few steps toward me. He grabbed me roughly by the back of the head and lowered his forehead to mine. His touch made my darkness recede instantly.

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