Page 51 of Icing Hearts

Vince huffs a laugh. “Did he now? I’m not surprised. He knows a different side of me. I haven’t always been the most…respectful guy. Especially before I had my heart broken. But feeling that hurt firsthand has definitely changed me.”

“Good to know,” I tell him.

When we pull into my driveway, I tell Vince we shouldn’t kiss, in case the chief is being weird and looking out the window or something. Inside is completely dark, and I use my phone to find my way upstairs after locking the door behind me.

As I rest my head on my pillow, I play the date over again in my head, start to finish. I’m happy with the things I said and did. Sometimes, when I replay moments, I’m filled with regret and those moments get stuck on a loop for hours.

This isn’t one of those times.

My mind is completely…

quiet.

Chapter 30

Clara

On Monday, Jack corners me before math class. Well, maybe the term corners is a little extreme. But he turns sideways and looks me right in the eye at close proximity. I certainly feel trapped—a wild animal with nowhere to run. Something in his eyes tells me he’s about to break his “no deep questions” promise.

“So, I was thinking,” he starts. Jack went to the party this weekend, but I stayed home. The chief was off for once and after the midweek date, I felt like it would be pushing it to go to a party. I had lots of reading to catch up on, anyway.

“Good morning, Jacky.”

“Actually, I’ve been thinking about your conundrum all week. Vince annoys me so I’m trying to find a way to not sit with him at lunch anymore, and I’m not gonna bail on you, so I’m stuck until I find a way to get rid of the ogre.”

“Why does he annoy you? How was the party? Any juicy drama?”

He ignores my questions and steamrolls forward. “Let’s go back to last weekend’s party. You slept in Victor’s bed.”

Was that only last weekend? I feel like so much has transpired since then. “I was drunk, and he helped me upstairs so I could sleep it off, yes.”

“What did Vince think about that?”

“Like I said, we left together the next morning and went to the diner with his friends, so he didn’t say anything. Plus, we had a great date last week.”

“So you mentioned,” he waves away my statement with his hand, clearly trying to redirect the conversation where he wants it. “And what did Victor think about that whole scenario?”

I shrug. “Don’t know.”

He raises his brow at me and humphs in my general direction. A chastisement if I ever heard one.

“What?”

“I didn’t say anything.” His mouth may not have said anything, but his face certainly is. Judgment and disappointment are written all over his features, and I’m second-guessing the whole friend thing thanks to my absolutist tendency.

“Fine.” I finish unpacking my materials and set my sparkly pencil pouch on the desk. I’ve had the same one since third grade. Everyone else had those Lisa Frank brand technicolor cartoon animal pencils and cases and folders, but we couldn’t afford name brand anything, even back then.

“It’s just…” Jack starts. There it is. He’s going to push me, and I’m going to hate it. “Did Victor seem hurt when you left with Vince? Has he acted jealous at all?”

I think back to the confused look on Tory’s face when I had been leaving that morning, and the fact that he basically tried to ask me out last Tuesday. “Maybe. He also may have alluded to wanting to date me last week.”

“He what?” Jack’s eyes go wide.

I angle my body and bring my face close to his so the seniors around us don’t eavesdrop. “So, here’s the thing. Tory didn’t actually tell me how he feels. He threw something out as a hypothetical, and I said no. Because it can’t happen, regardless of what either of us want. And maybe I haven’t asked Tory how he really feels because I don’t want to know. Whatever his answer is, I don’t think I could handle it. After all this time, he might just want something casual like Vince does, and if that’s the case, I would be gutted.”

“But on the flip—”

“I’m getting there. If he professed his love for me, I wouldn’t be able to handle that either. Because then, I would know what could be, but I would never be able to act on it. For me, when it comes to Tory, it would be all or nothing. And since it can’t be all, I choose nothing.”

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