Page 34 of Catch My Fall (Catch)

“We’ll compromise. I’ll take the shirt off and leave the sweatpants on.”

I couldn’t believe how stubborn he was being over something so silly. I was telling him to wear what he normally wears and he didn’t seem to want to do it. Darby’s earlier words were right there to haunt me, reminding me that Tristan was used to a very different type of relationship than the one that he has with me. Did I come off as being so virginal and uptight that he couldn’t really enjoy himself with me? If that was true, then I’ve been fooling myself about moving on from what Brady and Chad did.

Words started tumbling out of my mouth almost against my will. “What is it about me that says we can’t have a normal relationship? Do you not want to take these next steps? Am I wrong in thinking that we’re something that we’re really not? You treat me like spun glass and while I definitely appreciate it, I feel like we’ve grown past that. Have I turned into a best friend that you make out with? It’s been weeks and you never try to do anything with me other than kiss. If you don’t feel about me the way I feel about you, you really need to justsayso.”

He whipped his shirt off so fast that it was a blur. Like a shot he was across the room to me, taking my trembling hand in his and setting it down over his racing heart. With his free hand he lifted my chin so I was looking into his eyes. “Fuck, Mia, that’s not it at all. I want everything and then some but most of all, I wantyou. When I’m with you I feel like anything and everything is possible. Where once I saw only dark, you’ve brought the light. But I’m afraid I’ll push you too far, too fast and I’ll lose you and I know that I can’t handle that. Since the day I was born, I’ve tainted everything in my life. My biggest fear is that I’ll do something wrong and you’ll walk away leaving me with only the memories of this. I know that makes me sound like a pussy but I don’t care because I want you to know, to fucking understand, that I need you. I needyou, Mimi. All of this is just my way of showing you that I respect you and I won’t push you for what you’re not ready to give.”

Sliding my hand up his chest and over his throat, I grabbed his chin and pulled him closer. “I need you too, Stan. You aren’t fucking anything upunless you hide yourself from me. Nothing that you’re doing is tainting me, not at all. You’re healing me, every single day, every single kiss, every single word; you’re healing me. You’re giving me a gift that you don’t even understand you’re giving. Don’t ever say that you taint things again, because you don’t—you make them better. I want our relationship to be the real deal and that means that you can’t be afraid to be yourself around me. We’re getting into that bed and you’re wearing boxers just like you normally would.”

“Holyshit, Mia. Don’t ever say you don’t know that you kick my ass because you definitelydo.” Wrapping his arms around me, he spun me in a circle a few times before walking across the room and dropping me on the bed, smiling at me as I laughed like a dork.

He turned his back on me, turning every light off except the one dim light next to his bed before he pulled his sweatpants off. I swear to God, my mouth actually watered looking at his rearview. Even with his boxers on, I was seeing more of Tristan’s naked body than I ever had and he washot. So hot that I barely held myself back from giving a whistle of appreciation, but I tucked the desire away in my head to share later with Darby and Macy. It was pretty damn funny that I just wanted to whistle at the guy I was dating. I smiled at him as he came back to me, and he chuckled when he saw that I hadn’t moved.

“You didn’t get under the covers.”

“Ahh…I forgot.”

“You forgot?”

“Yep. You took off the pants and I was sitting here trying not to whistle at you. It appears that I have a dash of construction worker in me, sorry.”

He laughed at me as he held out his hands, pulling me up and off the bed when I laced my fingers with his. “You would be the most beautiful construction worker of all time. I’d pay money to stand and watch you use a hammer all day.”

Shoving at his chest, I laughed. “Yeah, only you’d be paying to watch me hammer stuff that wasn’t supposed to be hammered. I’ve got no tool skills.”

“Baby, it’s good to know that there are some things you don’t do well. Compared to you, I’m a train wreck.”

“No, you’re not. You’re wonderful and you’re changing my whole life.”

He kissed me then, a gentle kiss that said a hundred different things, each and every one of them music to my ears. When he stopped, he smiled into my eyes. After dropping another brief kiss on my lips he turned around and pulled the comforter back. When he turned me back toward the bed he took the opportunity to lightly smack my bottom as I climbed in, which made me laugh. As he got onto the bed, I could see that he was trying to decide what to do, so I made the decision for him, maneuvering my way awkwardly onto his lap and wrapping my arms around his shoulders before leaning in for a kiss.

The feel of his hot skin was a huge change, but one that I was very much enjoying. I scratched his shoulders gently, swallowing his groan of approval as the kiss deepened and I shifted on top of him in an attempt to find a better position. He solved that problem by dropping onto his back and turning so that we were each on our sides facing one another. I shivered because his hand was possessively lying on my ass and I threw my leg over his, my foot resting on the back of his calf as we continued to kiss desperately.

With only a thin layer of fabric covering him, I was able to really feel his erection nudging into me, but instead of being scared, I was turned on. We kissed hotly as I tried to do the impossible and get closer as I arched against him desperately.

A beautiful wave of dizziness swept through me when his hand slid under the waistband of my sleep shorts before he started tracing little circles against my core through my panties. Since the day we started kissing more passionately I’ve been getting very aroused for him, but this is way, way more than that. I was undeniably wet and I wondered if he was able to feel it through the fabric. The heat radiating from his chest against me was so sexy that all I could really think about was being skin to skin with him. I thought it through for a second, testing to see if that’s what I really wanted, and the answer came to me quickly. Yes, this was what I wanted. Breaking the kiss I said, “Wait, stop, I…”

Anything elseI was about to say was cut off because he practically levitated off the bed and across the room. “Jesus, fuck, I knew I should’ve worn the sweats! I’ll sleep in the living room.”

The shock of his abrupt departure from the bed all but left me with whiplash. “What? NO! Why?”

The look he gave me was one of utter confusion. “Babe, you said stop. That’s the get the fuck off the bed, shut everything the hell down word. You say stop, I stop.”

Any hesitation that I might have had about what I was about to do completely disappeared after he said that. Tristan’s… it. He’s just it. I wish I had more words… better words… words that could do justice to him, but I don’t.

“Stan… No, I didn’t mean for you to stop, stop. I meant hold on. I wanted to do this.”

Averting my eyes, I grabbed the hem of my sleep shirt and pulled it off, leaving the top half of myself naked. His harsh inhalation drew my gaze up to his, and I shivered from the heat blazing at me from his eyes.

“My God, Mimi… Are you trying to give me a heart attack? You’re too beautiful with your clothes ON. This is… Baby, are you sure you want to go this far?”

“I wouldn’t have taken my shirt off if I weren’t. I want to feel your skin on mine.” Holding out my hand I crooked my finger in a ‘come here’ motion.

All of the uncertainty left him as he came across the room towards me, his eyes on mine like a heat-seeking missile. Without even knowing I was doing it, I stood up to meet him halfway. When we came together he lifted me up and my legs instinctually wrapped around his waist as our naked chests touched for the first time. My already pebbled nipples somehow tightened even more.

“You’re fucking beautiful,” he growled as he ran his hand around from my back to my stomach, traveling slowly past my bellybutton and up until he cupped my right breast gently in his hand. “Beautiful, perfect… my girl.”

Leaning forward I licked the spot where his neck met his shoulder before giving it a little nibble and a gentle suck. “You’re pretty beautiful yourself, Stan. Not to mention very, very tasty.”

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