Page 18 of Cruel Tides

Kai is recovering. I shouldn’t have needed to remind myself. That was why he’d kept his shirt off, and it was why he was drawing me close to him now. He was tired and needed comfort while he healed—and not in the way my body was apparently anticipating.

“You’ll have to ask her in the morning,” I said, adding in a casual shrug. He didn’t need to know what his soft touches were doing to me. “Or I can run over now and wake her and Barren up?” That was a good idea—I wouldn’t need to worry about getting too comfortable with Kai if Laverne was here. Her attitude was even more impressive than her snoring. No one could kill a mood quite like she could. “I’m sure they’ll want to know you’re okay.”

Kai’s thumb paused, hovering over the delicate skin of my wrist. “Can we just stay like this?” he asked, and my insides thrilled as he reclined back into the pillows, taking me with him. “Just you and me?” His voice was suddenly rough. Was he really that exhausted?

“Of course,” I blurted. The two simple words had sounded far more eager than I’d meant for them to. “I mean, uh, you’ve been through a lot. We both have.” I was stammering now, and I let out an awkward laugh, trying to play it off. “Even after I tell you everything that happened, you’re still not going to believe it.”

Kai’s mouth drooped. “So, youdidhave fun without me?”

“What?No.” I gawked over at him. “It was the opposite of fun, actually. It was more like a nightmare.”

I almost believed he was actually upset when his lip started twitching. His frown cracked, turning back into a playful grin. “But you’re smiling.”

“Well—that’s because you’re here.” Heat flared over my face. It was hard not to smile while Kai was around. “You woke up… I was so worried you wouldn’t.”

“But I’m awake now.” His voice turned tender as his arm tightened around my shoulders. Then he pulled me in closer. “You didn’t get hurt, did you?”

“Just some scrapes,” I whispered, staring ahead. Normally, I wouldn’t have mentioned scrapes, but my mind was presently distracted. My eyes were level with one of his nipples—hard and pebbled, exposed to the air. My own breasts prickled as I thought about running my fingers over his smooth chest. Kai was built like a swimmer, compact and toned, the perfect body to stare at from across the beach. Or from right in front of your face.

But Kai was so modest about his chest, and from what he’d told me, every mer in the Pacific had the same complex. Even though I wanted to, he would hate it if I touched him… Wouldn’t he?

“Scrapes?” he asked, snapping me out of my thoughts.

“Yeah, but they’re nothing compared to what happened to you.” That’s right—he’d experienced more pain than I could imagine. Pain that had been meant for me. “I’m so sorry, Kai. I just—I don’t understand why you did it.”

His body froze like petrified stone, and his breath hitched before he whispered, “What do you mean?”

“Why did you risk your life like that?” I asked, setting myself up on an elbow to look at him. He looked like he was in pain, but not the physical kind. Like maybe it hurt that I didn’t understand why he’d done it.

Why did you risk your life for me, was what I really wanted to ask him, but I didn’t know what I’d do if he said it was because ofthe thrall. I didn’t want that type of attachment—a spell, a curse, a magical net that held us captive together. Not with Kai or with anyone. I wanted something more. Somethingreal, like what I felt for Leander. That was more than some conjured spell. Beyond the magic ofthe thrall.

“You almost died,” I said, the words a bare ghost of a whisper. My eyes searched his as my heart surged with both fear and eagerness, waiting to hear why he’d protected me, and knowing full well I couldn’t bear it ifthe thrallwas his only reason.

A contemplative hum vibrated Kai’s lips as he dropped his water bottle down to the bed. “No one has ever truly seen me before, Claira.” His hand drifted toward me, and the back of his knuckles skimmed over the side of my jaw. Goosebumps rose over my skin as all the hairs on the back of my neck lifted.

“Back in the Pacific, I’m just a number,” he continued. “I laugh and pretend to be what everyone expects me to be. A bother. A nuisance. Always last, never first. But when you look at me, I…” A tempting mixture of devotion and longing pooled in his eyes as he tucked a section of hair back behind my ear. “I know you see me,” he said, then his smile turned lopsided. “And I don’t know what to do. No one has ever looked at me before—not like you do. You look at me, and it’s like my heart is so tight it wants to explode. But then you look away, and I can’t wait for you to turn back to look at me again. I know we haven’t known each other very long, but this feeling I have, it’s deeper than that. Even if we had just met underwater, I still would have guarded you. So please don’t look sad because of me, okay? Because all I want to do is make you smile.”

“Kai…” I was nearly breathless; I didn’t know what to say. I’d been worried he would blame his actions onthe thrall, but how he felt about me was so much more than that. “You’re more than a number,” I whispered, just in case he needed to hear it.

His smile deepened, and the movement brought my eyes down to his lips. “Thank you, Claira.”

If it weren’t for Laverne, those lips would have kissed me once before. I’d wanted it then, but that longing was nothing like what I felt right now.

Unlocking our fingers, I drew my hand up, hovering it over his chest. Slowly, I eased in a deep breath. “May I… touch you?”

Kai’s eyes rounded as he stared at the flat of my palm. “Yes,” he breathed out, and his lips hardened like that word was the most wicked thing that had ever slipped through them.

My hand landed on the middle of his chest and both our bodies stilled as his warmth sent little sparks of heat up my wrist. Kai’s easy smiles had a way of disarming me, and I realized now I’d never truly noticed how masculine he was underneath his playful persona. He was smooth, yet firmer than I’d imagined, his skin easily sliding underneath my fingertips like it was urging me to feel out more of it.

Next to Barren, Kai had seemed so small. Now that it was just the two of us, it was obvious that the body before me held all the innate allures of a merman. How ridiculous it was that I hadn’t noticed before.

My hand kept grazing, skimming over the dips and curves of his pecs as his stomach clenched, his chest rising and falling in increasingly heavy bursts.

With anyone else, this would have been an innocent touch. But with Kai, it felt wildly intimate.

His deep draws of breath had me thinking he was enjoying this just as much as I was until I noticed his eyes flicking from where my hand slid against him, up to my face. Panic strained his features, and I pulled away, stricken.

Clearly, I’d rushed things. The poor guy had just woken up from nearly dying, and here I was, asking if I could touch him. Now that Leander had accepted my pull toward Kai, and Kai was finally awake, all I could think about was getting closer to him, bending the boundaries between us.But look at him, dammit. He looked so uncomfortable.

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