Page 109 of Perfectly Wild

I have whispered those words to him in our special times, and he understood the words to be a secret bond between us.

What happened after that is a blur.

Maria radioed ahead to organize a flight from Canaima to Ciudad, Bolivia.

I had emergency surgery for a ruptured ectopic pregnancy and a hysterectomy.

The weeks passed while in the hospital and allowed me time to heal and process the past and my future in a safe environment. Dawn received antibiotics for an ear infection and has commenced her childhood vaccinations.

Maria has alerted the authorities, and word has reached Albert I am safe but not up to talking yet.

I’m not sure I can even write anymore.

I am confused.

My heart is torn.

I almost died.

Why am I still alive?

January 1965

I have been in the hospital for almost two months and have finished extensive antibiotic therapy.

I anticipated writing in February, not January. In December 1963, there were two full moons. So, my journal dates were incorrect. Dawn was, in fact, born premature, only by a few weeks. During my stay, I have felt foolish not knowing the happenings of the outside world. My daughter doesn’t even have an exact date of birth.

Going by my hazy memory, we predicted the middle of January. Maria said, pick a date. So I went with the same day as Winston’s birthday, January 23, 1964. I’m not sure why, as I’d prefer to celebrate my children’s birthdates apart, yet in a panic, his special day came to mind, and possibly a sign of how much I missed him.

I also gave her Albert’s surname.

Dawn Monteford.

Not her father’s because who knows what that is.

It was the right thing to do because Dawn will be part of our family in Australia, and her birth certificate will have the same surname as ours with the father listed as unknown.

There’s also a process for sending me home since I was listed as missing for so long.

In my heart, I know I must return to Ulara first.

I need to retrieve my bag, especially my passport, visas, and camera.

I also made a promise to Weju and will uphold it to the gods, even if it’s for him to see us one more time.

And for me to say I’ll always love him and will never forget him.

I can already imagine the pain in his eyes and almost don’t want to go as there’s a slight chance I’ll stay for love.

Until I think about our future.

What will happen the next time I become seriously ill?

What will happen to Dawn?

I’m thankful she has received her childhood vaccinations and soon the measles vaccine. Something I am extremely grateful for.

And will Weju still love me if I can no longer bear more children?

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