Page 18 of Rain Washed

“But, Marietta just informed me that she never signed her side of the paperwork. The divorce was never finalized.” The words stung like a viper strike to the middle of his chest. “It seems we’re still married,” he confessed, looking up into Lacey’s eyes that were shining golden in the light of the fire, but he could see the confusion written in her gaze. He was definitely going to confirm this was the case, but Marietta had no reason to lie. Not now. “She didn’t sign the paperwork, and so her request for citizenship carried on. It can take between three to four years for an application for permanent residency to be approved. And you have to prove you’ve remained married for that whole time.” He hung his head in shame. “Marietta got her citizenship because she didn’t sign the divorce papers. She got what she wanted from me anyway, even though I left her. Even though I wanted nothing to do with her little plan.” It was so fucking ironic, he could barely believe it. He felt doubly betrayed. She’d used and abused him when he’d married her, and then she’d continued to fuck him over without his knowledge or consent. What a giant clusterfuck of a disaster.

“Maybe bitch was the right word,” she mumbled under her breath. “She’s certainly a piece of work. And I’m sorry you got caught up in her schemes.” Her hand still rested on his knee, but a coolness shrouded her features. “So, what’s she doing in Tasmania? Is she after some sort of reconciliation? Does she want to get back together with you?” He could hear the scorn in her voice. But he could also hear the fear and pain. A small part of her was terrified that was the reason Marietta had reappeared.

“God no!” He got to his feet, and began to pace, no longer able to sit still. Smudge moved quickly from his spot by the fire, standing out of the way in the door, his ears and tail drooping at the sound of raised voices. “And you have to believe me, even if she did want me back, there isabsolutelyno way I would have any part of it.”

Lacey also got to her feet, standing in front of him so that he halted his pacing. Her slight figure was outlined by the flames behind her, and all he wanted to do was take her into his arms. But as he reached out, she put her hand in the middle of his chest to stop him.

“That’s good to hear, Nico. But you haven’t told me what she wants yet.”

“She’s met a man that she wants to marry. Some wealthy bloke from America. And to do that, she needs the divorce to go through properly this time. She’s had a lawyer draw up the new papers and brought them down here to make sure I signed them immediately. It was just a coincidence that she ran into us in the bakery. She was on her way to find me at the station.” He could feel the outline of her fingers pushing into his breastbone. There was no softness to Lacey tonight, she was all rigid resistance.

“That’d almost be amusing if it wasn’t so bloody sad,” she replied.

“I’m definitely going to sign them,” he told her. “But I needed to talk to you first.”

“Maybe you shouldn’t sign, just to get some of your own back,” she harrumphed. Then she took a step backward, but the imprint of her fingers remained on his body.

“I’m going to sleep in the spare bedroom tonight,” she said simply.

His heart felt like it’d turned to ice. Everything had been so perfect. They were perfect together. The perfect couple. And because of his one mistake, it was all going to come tumbling down around him.

“Okay,” he acknowledged, though he wanted to stop her. Wanted to drag her to bed with him, even if all they did was lie together, skin on skin, connected and as one.

“Come on, Smudge.” Lacey put an affectionate hand on Smudge’s head, and he followed her down the hallway. Nico didn’t object. All he had was Lacey’s best interests at heart. She needed time to think, and he had to give it to her. Lacey needed the dog’s company to see her through the night, and he wasn’t going to take that away from her either. She was hurting, and for once he couldn’t be the one to soothe her.

Because he was the one causing the pain.

CHAPTER NINE

LACEY STARED AT the interior of Dotti 2.0 but couldn’t dredge up the enthusiasm to climb inside. She was supposed to be spending a few precious hours working on her Kombi this morning before her next shift, but her mind wouldn’t stop churning. Nico had left early for work on his motorcycle after they’d gone through the motions of eating breakfast but not speaking and hardly making eye contact. She was still no closer to an answer for her dilemma. A wall seemed to have gone up between them and she could see no way past it. Yet.

Her night spent alone in the spare bed had been a terrible experience. She’d hardly slept a wink, and at least three or four times, she had to stop herself from flinging back the bedclothes and marching down the hallway to throw herself into Nico’s arms. Even her intense judo training at the dojo last night hadn’t helped her to sleep. And her lack of deep sleep allowed the nightmares to come creeping in. More than once, Lacey had sat bolt upright in bed, cold sweat running down her spine as memories of soaring over the cliff in her van sent her heart racing and her arms windmilling as she fell through the air. She missed him. Missed his strong body next to hers. Missed listening to his gentle breathing while he lay sleeping, and the tickle of his stubble on her cheek as she snuggled into his shoulder. And she wondered if he were missing her just as badly.

What should she do with these feelings that wanted to burst out of her, like an alien ripping through her stomach and splattering everything with her suffering? The easy way out was to just forgive Nico. To put aside her feelings of betrayal and move on.

She should be able to empathize with Nico. She of all people should know what it was like to be the one who was being manipulated, being controlled by her own emotions. After having to deal with her mother for thirty-odd years. She should be able to forgive him; it wasn’t really his fault that woman was a complete nightmare. But there was one little sticking point that was stopping her.

Why hadn’t he told her?

Illogically, it made her wonder what else he was keeping secret from her.

Was there something else he wasn’t telling her? Was he perhaps still in love with Marietta? Was there some kind of deep connection he’d had with her that he’d never share with any other woman? It was stupid and irrational, especially in light of all he’d told her about that woman last night. But it still hurt deeply that he hadn’t respected her enough to tell her this one thing from his past.

She hated keeping secrets. Hated other people keeping secrets. Her mother was the queen of keeping secrets. Because knowledge was power. If you knew something someone else didn’t, then you held power over them. And you could wield that power in all sorts of dangerous ways.

Lacey had been completely open and honest with Nico. Once they had become a couple, she kept nothing from him. And even before that, she’d confided in him about her PTSD, and about her broken family.

“Lacey, dear. Are you in there?” an older woman’s voice drifted in through the roller door. Smudge bounded outside with a welcoming bark. “Hello, my beautiful boy. If you’re here, she must be around somewhere.” Lacey turned to see Margie marching through the door with Smudge on her heels. “Oh, good. I wasn’t sure if you’d be working today.”

“My shift doesn’t start till twelve,” Lacey replied, giving Margie an awkward hug, maneuvering her arms around the big plate Margie was carrying. Her arms were a little stiff from her workout last night, and she winced slightly, but it was a good soreness and she embraced the feeling. “I was trying to get some work done on Dotti.” She gave a meaningful sigh, because that now looked unlikely this morning.

“I brought you a plate of my famous rock cakes,” Margie said, eyeing the Kombi with a stern eye. She didn’t think it was right that a young woman might want to travel around the country alone. She’d never say that in so many words to Lacey’s face, but she was worried that Lacey was planning to leave Nico once her van was finished. It was illogical but in her own way it showed how much Margie cared.

“Let’s take them inside.” Lacey knew this wasn’t the only reason for Margie’s visit. Much as she adored the older woman, Margie was renowned for being the town gossip. She’d be digging for details on the recent double murder.

“I’d love a cup of tea, dear,” Margie replied, a question mark in her raised eyebrows. “Herb is in his shed tinkering with his bicycle, and I’m at a bit of a loose end.”

Lacey smiled indulgently and took the plate of rock cakes from Margie’s outstretched hands. “I could do with a cuppa myself,” she said, silently bidding her morning work on Dotti goodbye.

---