Page 117 of Until You (Forgive Me)

“Easy when you use a tracking app.”

It was one thing they’d always insisted on after becoming friends and travelling together. Neither seeing a reason to turn it off when they had set up their business.

“I’m sorry. I was hard on you this morning. I shouldn’t have pushed.”

May’s eyebrows were drawn together.

“You were right,” Isabella said, leaning back against the railing and staring out over the view. “I have run away, but not in the way you think. I’ve run to safety, instead of taking a leap of faith. We’ve not been together that long. Our relationship was intense. Yes, I love Christian. I have never felt for anyone what I feel for him... but what if it doesn’t work out? What if I’m a poor substitute for Lily, and he realises that?”

Isabella leaned her head on May’s shoulder as her friend wrapped her arms around her. “If you don’t give it a go, you will never know, and your life will become filled with what-ifs. Is that what you want? Or do you want to embrace the day and see where life might take you? I am not saying there won’t be issues ahead. Every relationship has its difficulties... even Arkhom and I.” May giggled as Isabella raised an eyebrow. “But it is not like The Retreat is going anywhere. If it doesn’t work out, you can always come back here. We will be here for you...”

“But that’s not fair to you,” Isabella turned to her friend. “I can’t leave you to run the business all by yourself.”

It was May’s turn to look sheepish. “Annelise wants to buy in. While you were away, she completed her training. She’s now fully qualified. She loves The Retreat, and is a whiz with the paperwork and bookings.”

A pang of pain lanced through Isabella’s chest.

“Don’t look like that,” May said, squeezing her hand. “The Retreat will always beourbaby. But what this means is you don’t have to feel guilty... You can follow your heart and dreams without worrying... I believe everything happens for a reason... Christian coming last year, the original CEO leaving... Richard and Annelise. You having to go to England. The pieces have all fallen into place, perfectly... the only thing wrong is you are here and Christian is in England.”

“But what if he’s moved on...” Isabella could not help but voice her fears.

“Pah,” May laughed. “He’s as mopey as you, according to Scarlett.”

It was Isabella’s turn to look shocked. “When did you speak to Scarlett?”

May’s cheeks darkened. “I may have answered your phone when you were taking a class. She’s really nice. I hope I get to meet her one day.”

“But May, he said nothing. He let me walk away without even a backward glance. He told me he loved me, but that was where it ended.”

“Men!” May said. “From what I can gather, he doesn’t think he deserves you. Has some idea that he hurts those he loves and lets them down. He also thinks you want to be here... didn’t feel he had the right to ask you to uproot your life when he couldn’t offer the same.”

Isabella closed her eyes. Could this be true? She knew Christian’s past had left him with baggage, but he’d handled all her problems and issues like a pro. She would never have been able to do it without his help and support. He’d been amazing. He certainly hadn’t let her down. But then, had she told him that?

“I need to go back, don’t I?” Isabella turned to her friend. “I need to know what he thinks. We need to have a proper conversation.”

“You do... and before you overthink it. Everything here will be fine. Yes, I will miss you, but the idea of you being happy is...”

Isabella watched May’s eyes mist over. Stepping in, she wrapped her arms around her friend.

“You’ve been the best friend a girl could ask for, and that will never change. Whether you are here or there. I’m only a phone call away. You just better holiday in Thailand, at least once a year. I’ll need to see you.” May whispered into her shoulder.

“That I can promise... this country will always hold a piece of my heart.”

“Come on, we need to book you a flight to London,” May said, linking their arms as they both pushed Kalaya down the hill.

Chapter Fifty-one

Isabella

“You have your passport... ticket?” May asked.

“I do.”

Isabella took a deep breath. Was she doing the right thing? Her heart was heavy at the thought of not seeing Christian, but thewhat-ifswere playing merry hell with her mental well-being.

“Stop!” May was facing her with her hands on her hips. “You need to stop with the self-doubt. Christian has already told you he loves you... he will never ask something of you that he cannot do himself. That is the kind of man he is. He cannot leave the UK and move here. His daughter prevents that, and I know you wouldn’t want that for him. You have to make the choice. Where is your heart currently?”

“You’re right. I left my heart in London. It’s just a lot...”

---