Page 61 of Beautiful Beginning

I was holding on for dear life, even if I only had a strand left to hold on to. “I love you, Chaz.”

There wasn’t a long pause, but still no excitement in his voice when he repeated it back. We hung up before I let his words dampen my mood.

“Car is ready to roll,” Lauren shouted from the living room.

I stuck my head out the door. “Now?” I looked at my phone. “It’s not time.” We agreed on an early start so we wouldn’t miss a minute of our break. But that damn early was not the time.

“You didn’t get the text?” Nia stood beside Lauren with her luggage in hand. “We gotta beat the beach traffic.”

“Okay, I’m coming.” I threw everything in my bag, zipped it and prayed I had everything I needed. Or that I didn’t need much. “Let’s roll.”

The four-hour car drive reminded me of car trips as a kid. With my family piled in the car on our way to a random place Mom picked. It’d be some place we’d never been before and may or may not have a decent hotel waiting on our arrival. There was one time we made it to the hotel in the middle of the night. But we ended up sleeping in the car because she refused to stay there. The next morning, we found a hotel down the street.

“I know you are back there all sad your boo didn’t come on the trip. But I won’t lie, I’m kinda glad he decided to stay back,” Nia turned around from the front seat. “This is it, our last spring break together.”

“Dang, you counting out any future trips together.” Lauren side-eyed her. “I was thinking we’ll have money, actual money, and can do bigger and better trips. Starting next year.”

I stared out the window. The piles of sand on either side of the road reminded me of snow. The crashing waves could have cast me out and let me drift away.

“Right, Journey?”

“Huh?” I looked to the front seat. “What’d you say?”

“Damn is it that bad? You dick deprived back there? Dazing off?” Nia laughed. “I wish I knew what that felt like.”

Nia and Lauren continued their tirade into what it’d be like to have a man. How it would feel to go a week without him. And the more they talked through imaginary scenarios it made me miss Chaz more. I cleared my throat, “How about we talk about something else?”

“I know,” Lauren blurted like she had the perfect suggestion. “We won’t talk aboutyour manbut how about the guys coming on the trip.” She tapped the steering wheel. “I heard they got that sexy ass barista to come.”

“Sexy ass barista.” I turned my head. “Who?”

“Ugh.” Lauren stalled. “I don’t know his name.”

Nia turned and looked at me. “But you know, the one who helped you to the car. From the club that night. When you were drunk.”

I smirked and tilted my head sideways. “Because I remember everything form that night.”

“Right.” Nia laughed. “Guess you’ll see when he gets there.”

Lauren sang, “And here we are.” There were two cars parked out front.

I didn’t understand why we didn’t caravan from campus. That’s what Mom would have suggested. We did it all the time when her sisters tagged along with us on family trips.No man left behind.

“Better get inside before they steal our rooms,” Lauren hurried from the car.

I took my time. Getting inside to a room I’d occupy alone didn’t matter much to me. If someone else claimed it, good for them. If I had the bright sunshine, the pool, and good drinks, I could sleep on the couch if I had to.

“Welcome to Bonita Casa la Hillside.” Danielle stood at the front door with her arms stretched.

“Did you fail Spanish?” Nia laughed as she barged her way past Danielle. “My room better be available too.”

Danielle shouted behind us, “Don’t worry, we respected the outlined house rules.” Her words dripped of sarcasm.

It was Lauren who insisted we have ‘house rules.’ After three years of something going wrong, she decided we needed to have a foolproof plan. She wanted to ensure our last and final spring break together went off without a hitch.

I didn’t take myself to the room. Instead, I went to the sliding glass doors and walked out to the pool. I found a seat under an umbrella and flopped down into it. The pool wasn’t the crashing waves, but the still water calmed me.

“I think it’s better out here too.” The deep voice caught me off guard.

---