Page 52 of Beautiful Beginning

I retorted, “Budget cuts in the spring, and not October. Anything is possible.” Before she could ask me to call Chaz, I already had the phone to my ear.

“I hope your boo has some reassuring news. Like the fact it won’t impact graduating seniors. At all. Like nada. If it helps they can keep the printed diploma and that little holder. I’ll take an electronic copy and print it my damn self.”

Nia was on something else. I held the phone until the robotic voice told me Chaz wasn’t going to reassure us. “Dammit, he isn’t answering.” I scoured the crowd as if anyone there could give us more than what was written on the school-wide notification.

Out in the parking lot, everyone stood around talking. I needed to get home. To at least get a few hours of studying before I dozed off. “I need to go.” I nudged Nia in the side. “Riding?”

“You good?” Danielle’s face twisted up. “You look like you have a gorilla on your back.” Her stare judged me from head to toe.

Nia didn’t budge. She looked from Danielle to me and said, “Doesn’t she though.” She plucked the shirt of my uniform. “Overwhelmed Journey does not look good on you at all.” She whispered, “Need to let that man come over and work some of that stress out of you.”

Danielle snapped. “Yes. That. And more of that.” She giggled. “What’s going on with you and our future U.S. president anyway?”

I hunched my shoulders and the gorilla they were talking about reminded me he was there. “We’re together.” I tried to sound as optimistic as possible.

Danielle cringed and looked side to side. “Well, around here. That’s something. You could be single and wishing you had someone, or with someone wishing things could be better. We are never happy.”

“You’re right. Starting to sense that in me. Not content with what I have.” I pouted. “I need to do better.” I looked at Nia. “I also need to get home. You coming?”

She followed behind me as I walked away. “Were you serious?”

As I pulled out of the parking lot I asked, “About what?” I had already started computing how many hours I’d have before I needed to be back on campus.

“About not being content with what you have. You think that’s the problem with you and Chaz?” I could feel her eyes on me.

“I don’t know. As much as I care about him. Love him. I thought it would be easier than this. I thought the relationship part would be all smiles and laughter.”

“Because where in life is that ever the case?” Her arms crossed over her chest. “Absolutely nowhere. Except for when we were kids, and our biggest problem was who we were going to play with at recess. Should have listened to my mama when she said don’t rush growing up. This part, this part right here kinda sucks.”

With a smirk I said, “Welcome to adulthood.” When we were at the apartment, I asked, “At some point it has to turn around though, right?”

“Think if we asked our moms they’d beg to differ. Life keeps on life’ing after childhood.” We both walked from the car faces drooping.

Inside the apartment, I saw a text message on my screen.

Chaz: In an emergency meeting, I’ll talk to you after.

“Chaz is in an emergency meeting.” My heart started to flutter. “I hope these budget cuts will not impact us.”

“Tell me as soon as you hear something.”

“Will do,” I promised before walking into my bedroom.

Getting in the shower was easy, sitting at my desk, not so much. The bed, pillows, and blankets were calling my name. But I knew even a few minutes of rest would throw off my whole night.

Two hours into it, my eyes grew heavy. I could hardly keep them open as the numbers and words started to cross. I couldn’t decipher interest rates from the policies that drove them. And when my phone vibrated across my desk I welcomed the distraction.

Chaz: Can I come see you?

The semester before we didn’t have a lot of late-night texts. When we got back to campus, they became the norm. Neither of us had a ton of time during the day to meet up, but before bed, we made sure to touch base.

Journey: I’m up studying

Telling him he couldn’t come through didn’t feel quite right. I wanted to see him. Could have lived with him occupying himself while I finished studying. Wouldn’t mind if the two hours of sleep I got were in his arms.

Chaz: I won’t stay long

I stared at the phone and thought all hell was about to break loose.

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