Page 32 of Beautiful Beginning

I tried to ease the tension I saw growing on her face. “How was the party last night?”

“Crowded.”

I reached for her hand. Laced our fingers together. “Listen, we knew this from the beginning. Thought our differences were what brought us together.” Of course, I spoke low so all the listening ears around us wouldn’t hear my confession. “I’m good with chilling one on one with you. Getting to know you. I’m also cool ifyouwant to get out. Chill with all yourmanyfriends.”

“So, why does it sound like a dig? That I have a lot of friends. Like it’s a bad thing?”

“Your easy to love, it’d be hard to believe if you didn’t.” I meant it in the sincerest way possible.

Still, Journey looked no more relieved when she heard it. For an hour, I picked over my toast, bacon, and eggs. Regretted not ordering more than an orange juice. For not asking them to hit it with a shot of Henny.

Me and Journey sat side-by-side, but I could have been across the room. Everyone around her had some story they had to tell her about the night before, or during homecoming week. A crazy situation that apparently never happened before. Everyone had a saga to share.

Across from me, the girl asked, “How was homecoming for you?”

With a hunched shoulder I replied, “Busy. Real busy.”

She was beaming like that was a positive response. “I bet. But look at you. Out here making changes on campus and what not.”

I didn’t know what changes she referenced because everything I suggested to the cabinet, or university board members, got struck down. I was only a face for the students. Not a voice.

It wasn’t what I wanted as an advocate of change. I wanted change. I wanted to see the difference. Becoming SGA president meant I’d be the difference.

“You think?” I asked hoping for an honest opinion.

But her smile fell, and eyes narrowed. After pondering the question, she answered, “Well what is it the SGA president does anyway?”

The guy beside her smirked and recited, “Exactly.” His enthusiasm matched mine and I imagined he was only there for her.

Plates cleared, checks paid, and finally we were leaving the restaurant. I stretched and met the sun with squinted eyes. It felt like we were holed up in a dungeon for hours and I welcomed the freedom, the space, the quiet.

“Do you have plans for today?” I asked Journey as I followed her to the parking lot.

“Lots of rest. Maybe we can catch up tomorrow?”

“Yeah,” I mumbled, “tomorrow.” I reached down and wrapped her in my arms.

Her head shifted up and she kissed my lips. It was soft, but quick. Didn’t linger like I would have wanted it to. Still, I appreciated the connection after a week of nothing.

We separated, both of us going to our own cars. And once I was inside mine, Marcus yelled, “Yo.”

“What?”

“Exactly.” He pointed to the restaurant. “What happened in there?”

The opening door, another few people walking inside, held my stare. “It’s me, man.” I admitted, “I’ve never liked crowds. I’m cool with a few people. But I like to keep my circle small. She’s not like that. Apparent by all those people in there. But I don’t know if we have a middle ground. If we can find one.”

“I don’t know, man. Your circle is more like a period. You could open it a little more.” He squeezed his fingers together in front of his face as his eyes closed into a squint.

“Easy for you to say.” I started the car and looked in the rearview mirror before pulling out of the spot. “You made five new friends in there.”

“Even managed an invite to Thanksgiving.”

I side-eyed him. “Of course, you did.”Thanksgiving.“Hadn’t thought about what I’m doing yet. And here you are with someone welcoming you into their house.”

“You have a girl, bruh, that’s an automatic invite.”

It wasn’t as obvious to me. Every year I went home for the holidays, and every year someone in my family asked if I was bringing a girl home. It never happened. I couldn’t assume Journey would be ready to take me home with her. Not after the week we had, and the brunch that didn’t exactly go all that well. “I don’t know. We haven’t exactly talked about it yet.”

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