Page 14 of Anger

I’m beginning to think now that I’d done too good a job shoving those memories aside and locking them up tight. Because once the corner of that box was lifted, they exploded out, the memories of those weekends and of Emily’s connection all mixed together.

I was perfectly fine.

I was balanced and in control of my head.

At least until I saw her on the grand staircase heading up to where Ezra stood at the top.

It was when she turned to look at me standing at the base of the stairs that I lost control completely.

Just that.

One look

It’s been a spiral into the deepest parts of hell ever since.

I’m not going to bore you with the details because you know how a spiral goes.

One event occurs that leads to another and another and another.

You find yourself fucking miserable while smiling to pretend that nothing is wrong.

Except everything is wrong

Next thing you know, you’re in a fucked-up situation with no ending in sight.

So yeah, Ezra and I saw Emily again for the first time in years. We both fucked with her. I made an ass out of myself by thinking it meant something and went to her house with some delusional ideas.

Maybe I’m not homeless anymore.

Maybe she’s returned.

Maybe she’s sorry for the way she ghosted us when we left for Yale.

Turns out all those maybes were definite nos … At least for me they were.

While I was sent away from her house with excuses and tears, Ezra convinced her to hang out as friends.

We have one date a week and just finished the first one.

I was excited after that date.

Maybe we’d never be lovers, but all three of us could be friends.

Emily went home after.

Ezra and I rode to our house together.

Now my twin brother is gone again.

Do you think I don’t know where he went?

I can’t sit in this empty fucking house and do nothing. Especially while knowing Ezra is with Red.

And since I’m not invited over there, I’ll hit up another place where nobody wants me.

Stepping away from my bike, I approach Myth as sure-footed as possible. It’s the first time I’ve been here since Shane and I were arrested for the fight upstairs.

Two against seven seemed like unfair odds in that fight, but I still left the club laughing. Turns out a little bit of anger is enough to cause serious damage, but thankfully, nobody was killed.

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