Page 37 of Why Not Me?

Smiling, I lean in and give him a quick kiss. “You’re right. We can’t compare what we have now to before. We’re older, wiser, and this is a real relationship.”

He holds me close, the steady beat of his heart comforting. I’m appeased, but only a little. We need the time. The foundation. It took a long time for things to feel steady with Brendan and me, it’s going to take time with Landon too. I just hope that we meet each other’s expectations.

Closing my eyes, I curl into Landon and kiss his chest. That’s how we fall asleep, wrapped around each other.

Over the next month I work hard to show Allie that the reality is just as good as the fantasy. We finally go zip-lining in the mountains, we walk every day through the park with PeeWee, and we end each day curled up on one of our couches with both of our pets, who surprisingly get along extremely well.

Glancing at my clock, I suppress a yawn when I realize I have one more client to get through before I get to go home to pick up PeeWee and head to Allie’s for the night.

Shutting down my computer, I lock everything up and then head into the main clinic area. I smile when Carson walks in. He’s a thirteen-year-old boy who injured his knee playing football.

“Carson, my man!” We bump fists as he comes in. “How’s the knee?”

“It’s getting better. Can I play again soon?” he asks in an eager voice.

“Let’s check it out.”

I check out his knee and then have him do a series of exercises. It’s significantly better, but he shouldn’t play quite yet.

“So, I have good news and bad news. Which do you want first?” I’m direct, but gentle as I sit down on the bench next to him.

“Bad news, obviously.” Carson sighs, disappointment heavy in his tone.

“You can’t play yet. However, you’re close. If you do your exercises, I think you’ll be ready for the field in a couple of weeks.”

He nods, his face falling, but he works through the rest of our session like a trooper. At the end, his mom still hasn’t come back to pick him up.

“Where’s your mom?” I glance at the clock and see she’s ten minutes late. It’s unusual for her to be late, but I also know they’ve been struggling trying to coordinate all the appointments since his dad’s out of town and she’s managing five kids on her own.

Carson looks out the window, the crease in his brow smoothing. “There she is. She had to pick up Ty from soccer practice, it must’ve ran late.”

He shoves the door open, waving as he heads out. “See you next week, Landon!”

Gathering my things, I race out the door while dialing Allie.

“Hey, babe! Where are you?” I can hear the smile in her voice and it’s a soothing balm to a long day.

“I’m sorry, I just left work. Why don’t you order Chinese, and I’ll pick it up after I grab PeeWee.”

Hanging up, I race home ignoring Josh as I grab my bag and clip PeeWee’s leash onto his collar. This entire day I’ve felt rushed and all I want is to get to Allie’s where I will finally be able to unwind.

At the end of every day, whether the day is good or bad, the highlight is seeing her. She always manages to put a smile on my face and the couple of months that we’ve been together I’ve never been happier.

I’m still head over heels in love with her, but I think it’s too soon to tell her. We need more time, we need to enjoy this togetherness without pushing things to move too fast. I want to savor our time, cherish each moment instead of rushing them. All our previous memories are tainted with hurry and secrets. Not this time.

Thirty minutes later we’re walking into Allie’s condo. PeeWee races off after I unclip his leash, searching for Blade.

Allie is nowhere to be seen, so I carry the Chinese food to the kitchen table and set everything out. I just finish setting the table when arms wrap around me from behind.

Turning in her embrace, I lean down and kiss her. I love being able to kiss her after a long day at work. “This, this is one of my favorite parts of the day. Nothing compares to your smile.”

I wish when I was coming home to her, that this was our home. My head has moved into overdrive. Despite agreeing to start fresh, from scratch, my brain hasn’t quite gotten the memo. Every time I see her, all I can do is imagine where we could be instead of where we are.

My brothers have moved from harassing me about crushing on someone in a relationship to harassing me about being so mushy. I just laugh right back at them because one day they’ll be in my shoes. I love Allie and I’m not ashamed to show it.

“It’s my favorite too. That, and having dinner with you and talking about our day.” She sits down at the kitchen table, breathing in the delicious aroma coming up from the spread on the table. “This smells amazing. I’m starving, my meeting ran long and I didn’t get to eat lunch today.”

We dig in, Allie telling me how the park is progressing. She’s been so stressed out over it, but despite the strain and the immense weight on her shoulders, she loves what she does and her hard work is why this town is as beautiful as it is. She doesn’t realize that she is imprinted all over, her touch creating beauty everywhere you look.

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